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[Copyright Facsimile Image]Page 198
IL ET ELLE
(01) Ce fut vers la fin de l'année 1916 que je fis leur connaissance. Mon fiancéEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician, who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini se battait alors dans l'armée italienne, sur le front des DolomitesDolomites Mountain Range (historical), a mountain range in Italy. Dans ses moments de repos, il écrivait des contes de fées, destinés à nos futurs enfants. Comme il appréciait le talent de l'artiste danoise Gerda WegenerGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener, dont les dessins paraissaient dans La Vie Parisienne, que je lui envoyais régulièrement, il m'avait chargée de m'adresser à elle pour les illustrations de ses contes. Je savais qu'elle avait fait une très jolie couverture pour un livre de Maurice MagreMaurice Magre (1877-1941), a French author, je demandai donc à mon vieil ami de nous mettre en rapport. C'est ainsi que nous sonnions, quelques jours plus tard, à la porte d'un atelier de la rue de Lillethe Wegeners’ studio (historical), located on rue de Lille in Paris.
(02) Nous pénétrâmes dans une grande pièce arrangée avec goût : quelques meubles
anciens, des châles espagnols, des vases de fleurs et les toiles du ménage
scandinave, car le mariEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 aussi était
peintre.
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Paysagiste accompli, il excellait
dans la perspective. GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener et Einar WegenerEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 nous offrirent des sièges et
prirent eux-mêmes place en face de nous sur un grand divan noir et or, garni
de coussins aux coloris divers. Ainsi, côte à côte, ils me rappelaient les
personnages des contes d'AndersenHans Christian Andersen (1805-1875), a famous Danish author known for his fairy tales,
particulièrement ceux de La Reine de Neiges :
Gerda WegenerGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener si blonde, si claire,
personnifiait, pour moi, l'autre Gerda, celle qui était allée, au péril de
sa vie, rechercher son cher Kaj dans le palais enchanté, tandis qu'EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 était une exacte réplique de ce
Kaj au sourire espiègle, se jouant sur de lèvres bien dessinées. La jeune artisteGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener portait les cheveux tirés en
arrière, noués en un chignon bas sur la nuque, et deux rouleaux, pareils aux
marteaux du XVIIIe siècle, ornaient ses tempes; un
ruban de velours noir faisait ressortir davantage la blancheur de sa gorge.
Dans une cage voisine, deux perruches inséparables — l'une vert acide et
l'autre cendre verte — s'ébattaient joyeusement. Elles semblaient l’emblème
vivant de leurs maîtreKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948s, qu’on sentait si tendrement unis, inséparables eux
aussi. Une égale limpidité éclairait les prunelles dorées d'EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 et le regard céruléen de GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener. On avait le sentiment que leur clarté
était le reflet même de leur âme nette et propre, et je fus entraînée vers
eux par un courant de sympathie, qui devait se transformer bientôt en une
indissoluble amitié.
(03) Nous causâmes du motif qui nous amenait, et GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener parut très désireuse d'exécuter ce travail.
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Après
que nous eûmes admiré les œuvres des deux artistes, il fut convenu qu'elle
écrirait le soir même à mon fiancéEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini,
pour se mettre d'accord avec lui, et ils décidèrent de faire sa connaissance
le jour de notre mariage. Au cours de la réception qui suivit la cérémonie
nuptiale, je présentai le jeune ménage à mon mariEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini; comme moi, il le prit aussitôt en amitié. Nous nous
revîmes le surlendemain, longuement, en prenant le thé à la Boulangerie ViennoiseBoulangerie Viennoise (historical), a Viennese bakery in Paris; ce fut là qu'on
décida de tous les détails du volume.
(04) Nous partîmes le même soir en voyage de noces, pour RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy.
(05) Dès mon retour, cinq mois plus tard, nos relations amicales reprirent, de plus en plus cordiales et affectueuses. Je venais de perdre ma mère et j'attendais mon premier enfantJoselyn Allatini (1918-1947), daughter of Hélène Kann Allatini. Mes amis scandinaves m'entourèrent et je trouvai un grand réconfort dans leur affection les jours où, sans nouvelles de mon mariEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician, who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini, ils se multipliaient en attentions et tâchaient de me divertir de leur mieux, pour me détourner de mon angoisse.
(06) Au mois de mai 1918, se forma à VersaillesVersailles (historical), a royal palace outside Paris,
le
Conseil Supérieur de Guerre des Alliés. Le général Nicolis de RobilantGeneral Nicolis di Robilant (historical), likely Mario Nicolis di Robilant (1855-1943),
an Italian General in WWI,
chef de mon mariEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini et vieil ami de sa
famille, fut désigné pour représenter l'ItalieItaly is a European country whose capital is Rome.. Dès son arrivée, il vint me voir, accompagné de son
officier d'ordonnance, le comte Mario di CarrobioCount Mario di Carrobio (historical), unidentified but possibly Count Mario Gabrielli
di Carpegna (1856-1924), an Italian soldier and politician, beau comme un jeune dieu, drapé dans la superbe
cape bleu de ciel des officiers de cavalerie. A peine entré en conversation,
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l'adorable généralGeneral Nicolis di Robilant (historical), likely Mario Nicolis di Robilant (1855-1943),
an Italian General in WWI me dit d'une air
malicieux : « Que diriez-vous si EricEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini
était nommé à VersaillesVersailles (historical), a royal palace outside Paris? En
seriez-vous très ennuyée? »
(07) Je faillis lui sauter au cou.
(08) Quelques jours plus tard, mon mariEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician, who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini arrivait à ParisParis (historical), capital of France pour rejoindre son nouveau poste et, peu de temps après, je m'établissais à VersaillesVersailles (historical), a royal palace outside Paris, avec ma petite filleJoselyn Allatini (1918-1947), daughter of Hélène Kann Allatini. Nous y menions une vie délicieuse, fréquentant les autres jeunes ménages des quatre nations, parmi lesquels nous cimentâmes quelques amitiés fidèles.
(09) Le
couple Wegener vint nous voir souvent dans la charmante villa que nous avions louée, et décida de passer la fin de
l'été et une partie de l'automne à VersaillesVersailles (historical), a royal palace outside Paris. Ils prirent un petit appartement àrue de RéservoirsHôtel des Reservoirs (historical), at that time a hotel on rue des Réservoirs near
the park of Versailles
et nous nous vîmes quotidiennement. Je me rappelle, non sans émotion, les
exquises matinées dans le parc du Château, aux côtés
d'EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931,
(BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 pour ses intimes), tandis qu'il
m'initiait, tout en peignant, aux beautés cachées des jardins. Ce fut lui
qui me montra que chaque bassin était d'une couleur différente, chose que je
n'avais jamais remarquée. Il avait une âme d'enfantEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, pure, ouverte à la nature et à toutes ses
merveilles. Nous nous entendions fort bien; d'ailleurs, qui ne se serait
entendu avec ce charmant garçonEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, plein
de douceur et de tendresse. Il adorait sa femmeGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener et s'efforçait de lui épargner les moindres corvées de
la vie courante; c'était lui qui commandait aux
fournisseurs, aux marchands de couleurs, écrivait aux éditeurs,
achetait les provisions, afin
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qu'elle pût se consacrer entièrement
à son art. De son côté, elle lui témoignait une affection presque
maternelle. Dans le quartier, tout le monde aimait BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, si poli, si plein de tact et de gentillesse;
les commerçants lui procuraient tout le charbon et
le sucre nécessaires, même dans les périodes de restrictions où il était le
plus difficile d'en obtenir. Les deux époux ne se quittaient jamais,
partageant chaque joie, chaque émotion, dormant côte à côte avec leur petite
chienne fox, « VâpeHvappe (fictional and historical), nicknamed Vâpe, the Wegeners’ (Sparres’) dog ».
(10) A ParisParis (historical), capital of France, ils quittèrent leur atelier de la rue de Lillethe Wegeners’ studio (historical), located on rue de Lille in Paris, pour s'installer dans les environs du Champ-de-MarsChamps de Mars (historical), a park in Paris, dans un atelier plus grand et plus agréable que le précédent. Nous habitions alors près de la place de l'AlmaPlace de l’Alma (historical), a bridge in Paris open to traffic, ce qui nous permettait de les voir souvent, même dans cette villeParis (historical), capital of France où il est si difficile, à cause des distances, de fréquenter ses amis comme on le voudrait.
(11) Je me souviens d'une petite histoire assez curieuse qui m'advint chez les Wegener. Ils nous avaient invités à dîner, pour nous faire connaître un de leurs meilleurs et plus anciens amis, le diplomate danois T. B.T. B. (historical), an unidentified Danish diplomat, homme fort cultivé.
(12) — Vous verrez combien il est irrésistible et captivant, me dit GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener, « il a une conversation éblouissante et connaît son XVIIIesiècle comme personne, mais il a un grand défaut : il ne peut pas voir une jolie femme sans lui faire la cour, et je vous préviens qu'il est très entreprenant, surtout avec les blondes! »
(13) Le soir du dîner, elle me présenta ce Don JuanT. B. (historical), an unidentified Danish diplomat
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nordique; arrivé le matin même de
CopenhagueCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark, il devait repartir
quelques jours plus tard pour MadridMadrid (historical), capital of Spain,
son nouveau poste. J'êtais sa voisine de table, et je ne
sais pas
si la fatigue du voyage l'avait abruti à ce point, mais il ne m'adressa pas
la parole et laissa même tomber la conversation chaque fois que je fis un
effort pour l'engager. Après les propos de GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, je commençais, je l'avoue, à me sentir un peu piquée.
Nous en étions à la salade, quand le pied de mon voisinT. B. (historical), an unidentified Danish diplomat vint se poser sur le mien, comme une lourde caresse.
« Ça, c'est trop fort, me dis-je, il prend un air accablé, m'ignore
complètement et puis, il s'imagine qu'il peut me faire du pied... et en
chaussettes encore! » Car, pour l'occasion, le coupable avait enlevé son
soulier! J'essayais de retirer mon pied, sans attirer l'attention des
autres convives, tâche difficile, celui de
mon agresseurT. B. (historical), an unidentified Danish diplomat étant tenace et pesant.
A peine
l'avais-je dégagé qu'il s'en emparait à nouveau. Je me sentais devenir
cramoisie : à ma grande terreur, le pied entreprenant montait lentement et
arrivait déjà plus haut que la cheville, tandis que son propriétaireT. B. (historical), an unidentified Danish diplomat continuait à garder son air impassible et
hypocritement serein. Une pareille sournoiserie me fit sortir de moi-même :
« Tu vas voir » me dis-je, et, rassemblant toutes mes forces, je lui envoyai
un formidable coup de pied. Un hurlement canin retentit : c'était la petite chienne foxHvappe (fictional and historical), nicknamed Vâpe, the Wegeners’ (Sparres’) dog la véritable coupable, qui
avait reçu le châtiment. Ceci prouve, une fois de plus, qu'il faut se méfier
de son imagination.
(14) Je me rappelle un autre petit fait, qui advint aussi chez les Wegener. Je devais dîner chez mon amie Baby de Friedlander-FuldMarie-Anne von Goldschmidt-Rothschild (historical), (née Friedlander-Fuld, 1892-1973), known as Baroness Rotschildt; a friend of Kurt Warnekros — maintenant baronne de Goldschmidt-RothschildMarie-Anne von Goldschmidt-Rothschild (historical), (née Friedlander-Fuld, 1892-1973), known as Baroness Rotschildt; a friend of Kurt Warnekros — de passage à ParisParis (historical), capital of France. Nous projetions d'aller ensuite toutes deux chez EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 et GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener qui donnaient une petite fête. En arrivant chez BabyMarie-Anne von Goldschmidt-Rothschild (historical), (née Friedlander-Fuld, 1892-1973), known as Baroness Rotschildt; a friend of Kurt Warnekros, je remarquai son air désappointé. « Je suis furieuse, me dit-elle, moi qui me réjouissais tant de mettre ce soir ma nouvelle robe de tulle mordoré brodée d'or, je ne puis le faire! »
(15) — Qu'y a-t-il? T'a-t-on manqué de parole?
(16) — Non, elle est là, derrière toi, sur une chaise.
(17) — Mais alors, va-t-elle mal? est-elle trop étroite... Trop large? Il y a peut-être moyen de l'arranger...
(18) — Non, rien de cela, au contraire, elle me va à merveille, mais cet animal d'Hellstern ne m'a pas livré mes souliers de satin marron...
(19) — N'as-tu donc pas une vieille paire d'un brun quelconque qui pourrait aller?
(20) — Non, la seule paire que j'aie est dans un tel état qu'il n'y faut pas songer; les bouts sont blancs et si usés qu'on voit la doublure.
(21) J'eus une inspiration de génie : « Il n'y a qu'à les frotter avec une barre de chocolat et on ne s'apercevra de rien. » On courut à la cuisine et, quelques minutes plus tard, mon amie apparaissait à table dans une ravissante robe, avec des souliers marron impeccables.
(22) En arrivant chez les Wegener, elle reçut des
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compliments de tout le monde. Nous
nous assîmes et on commença de faire un peu de musique. La petite chienne
VâpeHvappe (fictional and historical), nicknamed Vâpe, the Wegeners’ (Sparres’) dog qui, vous le savez, avait une
attirance particulière pour les pieds, vint se coucher devant ceux de mon
amie BabyMarie-Anne von Goldschmidt-Rothschild (historical), (née Friedlander-Fuld, 1892-1973),
known as Baroness Rotschildt; a friend of Kurt Warnekros, mais à peine eut-elle
flairé l'odeur du chocolat, qu'elle se précipita sur le bout des souliers et
se mit à les lécher goulument. On essaya de l'en empêcher, mais elle
commença à grogner d'une façon peu rassurante. Finalement, elle arracha une
des chaussures du pied de sa propriétaire
et se sauva sous une commode pour s'en régaler plus à l'aise. Ce fut un
éclat de rire général et nous dûmes expliquer l'origine de ce festin, ce qui
obtint le plus vif succès.
(23) Mais revenons à nos moutons, ou plutôt à nos peintres. Comme j'admirais, un
jour, le ravissant dos d'un nu de femme exécuté par GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, celle-ci me confia : « Vous ne devinerez jamais qui a
posé pour ce dos... c'est BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 en
personne. Depuis quelque temps déjà, il me sert de modèle, ce qui m'est fort
commode, car, nulle part, je ne pourrais trouver un dos pareil. »
La
tableau représentait une sorte de bacchante blonde, aux cheveux courts,
couronnée de pampres et allongée nonchalamment sur un lit de repos, la tête
légèrement inclinée et tournée vers le public. Les jambes étaient aussi
celles de BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931. On eut juré des jambes de
femme, si longues et fuselées. Je n'en revenais pas! GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener avait pris une petite photo d'EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 pendant une séance, et je la suppliai de
l'emporter au restaurant, où nous devions dîner avec nos maris et des
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amis communs. On fit circuler
l'image qui stupéfia tout le monde. Notre amie, la marquise de S. G.Marquise de S.G. (historical), unidentified, dont le mari était en retard, s'écria :
« Faisons une farce à EmilioMarquis (historical), husband of Marquise de S. G., unidentified, il va
arriver d'un instant à l'autre. Que GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener lui montre la photo comme celle d'une de ses amies, et
nous verrons s'il reconnaît EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931. » En
bon Napolitain, coureur de femmes, le marquisMarquis (historical), husband of Marquise de S. G., unidentified fut complètement affolé par ce nu ravissant : « Oh! Qui
est-ce, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener? Vous dites que c'est une
amie à vous qui a posé pour vous faire plaisir... mais il faut que je la
connaisse tout de suite. Jurez-moi que vous me présenterez à elle. »
Contenant mal son envie de rire, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener
le lui promit, mais ajouta que la personne en question était assez farouche
et d'ailleurs, absente de ParisParis (historical), capital of France en ce
moment. Plus elle faisait surgir de difficultés, plus le pauvre marquisMarquis (historical), husband of Marquise de S. G., unidentified s'enflammait. Il prenait même BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 à témoin, le priant de rappeler à sa femmeGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, s'il le fallait, la promesse qu'elle
venait de faire. Nous en pleurions de rire. Le brave EmilioMarquise de S.G. (historical), unidentified refusa net de rendre la photo. Il la
garda dans son portefeuille et, depuis, il ne se passa pas de jour qu'il ne
se renseignât sur le retour de la belle bacchanteEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931. Il en avait à ce point perdu la tête qu'en sortant
d'une grande soirée, au moment de présenter son numéro de vestiaire, il
donna par erreur la fameuse photo : « Vieux saligaud! Pour qui me
prenez-vous? » lui cria la vierge mûre
du vestiaire, en la lui lançant presque au visage.
(24) Devant le tour tragique que semblaient prendre les événements, nous décidâmes
de révéler la vérité
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à l'incandescent marquisMarquis (historical), husband of Marquise de S. G., unidentified. Il le prit fort mal, déchira la photo,
dans un accès de rage noire, et, pendant des semaines, n'adressa plus la
parole à aucun de nous.
(25) Je ne puis pas m'empêcher de sortir encore une fois de mon sujet, pour vous raconter une anecdote qui date d'environ cinquante ans et dont le héros est l'archevêqueArchbishop of Naples (historical), unidentified but possibly Guglielmo Sanfelice d’Acquavilla, Archbishop of Naples from 1878-1897 de NaplesNaples (historical), city in Italy, oncle de notre marquisMarquis (historical), husband of Marquise de S. G., unidentified.
(26) Ce prélatArchbishop of Naples (historical), unidentified but possibly Guglielmo Sanfelice d’Acquavilla, Archbishop of Naples from 1878-1897, connu pour son avarice, avait depuis des années un unique valet qui servait d'homme à tout faire, et auquel il ne donnait cependant que huit lires par mois d'appointements. Ce serviteur vint un jour lui demander une augmentation.
(27) — MonseigneurArchbishop of Naples (historical), unidentified but possibly Guglielmo Sanfelice d’Acquavilla, Archbishop of Naples from 1878-1897 sait combien je lui suis attaché et que je serais inconsolable de devoir quitter son service, mais je ne puis pas continuer ainsi. Le prix de la vie augmente tous les jours et je n'arrive plus à m'acheter l'essentiel, avec mes huit lires. D'ailleurs, tous les autres gagnent jusqu'à vingt lires et vont encore être augmentés. Je viens donc prier MonseigneurArchbishop of Naples (historical), unidentified but possibly Guglielmo Sanfelice d’Acquavilla, Archbishop of Naples from 1878-1897 de m'accorder au moins deux lires de plus par mois.
(28) — Ce que tu viens de dire est juste, répliqua Son ExcellenceArchbishop of Naples (historical), unidentified but possibly Guglielmo Sanfelice d’Acquavilla,
Archbishop of Naples from 1878-1897, mais, à mon vif
regret, il m'est impossible de te donner davantage. Cependant, comme je
comprends fort bien que ton salaire actuel soit insuffisant et comme je suis
très satisfait de tes services, je veux faire quelque chose pour toi. Je
t'accorde donc, à partir d'aujourd'hui, deux heures de liberté chaque
après-midi, de une à trois heures, au moment où la circulation est le
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plus dense, sur le Pont du Château de l'Œuf,
tu pourras y aller mendier. Ainsi, tout s'arrangera pour le mieux. »
(29) Et l'on pu voir quotidiennement, à l'entrée du Pont, le valet de l'archevêqueArchbishop of Naples (historical), unidentified but possibly Guglielmo Sanfelice d’Acquavilla, Archbishop of Naples from 1878-1897 tendre la main. Et cela ne choquait personne... O dolce NapoliNaples (historical), city in Italy!
(30) Je reviens aux Wegener pour ne plus les quitter. Je demandai à GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener depuis quand elle s'était aperçue, pour la première fois, des contours féminins de BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931.
(31) — Cela remonte loin, me répondit-elle, même avant la guerre. Nous étions
encore à CopenhagueCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark et je faisais le
portrait d'une actriceAnna Larsen (fictional), modeled on Anna Larssen, a Danish actress, friend of the
Wegeners très connue. Un
jour, elle téléphona, au dernier moment, pour décommander la séance. J'étais
furieuse et déçue, ayant gardé mon après-midi pour elle. BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, me voyant contrariée de ne
pouvoir pas
avancer mon travail, s'offrit à remplacer le modèleAnna Larsen (fictional), modeled on Anna Larssen, a Danish actress, friend of the
Wegeners, du moins pour la robe, s'il parvenait à la passer. Je
fus stupéfaite de voir que, non seulement elle lui allait à merveille, mais
encore qu'il avait des épaules de femme, éblouissantes. Je m'amusai alors à
compléter l'illusion en posant sur sa tête une perruque blonde, qui me
restait du carnaval et en le fardant de mon mieux. Je me mis ensuite à
peindre et fus surprise, en plein travail, par mon véritable modèleAnna Larsen (fictional), modeled on Anna Larssen, a Danish actress, friend of the
Wegeners, qui venait s'excuser de m'avoir fait faux
bond. En voyant sa robe sur une autre personne, elle fut un peu étonnée,
mais ne reconnut pas EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931. Pendant un
bon moment je lui fis croire qu'une amie l'avait remplacée pour me rendre
service
[Page 209]
et me permettre d'avancer son
portrait. Le timbre de voix de BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 finit
par le trahir et la jeune femmeAnna Larsen (fictional), modeled on Anna Larssen, a Danish actress, friend of the
Wegeners, riant à
gorge déployée, ne parvenait pas à revenir de son ébahissement. Elle
s'invita à dîner et fit monter du champagne « pour boire à la santé de sa
nouvelle amie, LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 ». Pendant le repas, on
baptisa BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 au champagne, et depuis lors,
il posa souvent pour moi, se déguisant en femme chaque fois que l'occasion
s'en présentait. BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 adorait ce genre de
travail et aimait à mystifier les gens, qui le prenaient invariablement pour
une fille d'Eve.
A
divers bals costumés, il fit sensation et prit de plus en plus l'habitude de
personnifier LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931. Un soir, qu'enrhumée, je
ne pouvais
pas sortir,
il mit ma plus jolie robe décolletée. Après que je l'eus soigneusement
coiffé et maquillé, il se rendit, en compagnie d'un de nos jeunes amis, à
un dîner suivi de soirée dansante qu'on donnait chaque quinzaine à un club
d'artistes et de gens du monde auquel nous appartenions. A part ce
jeune ami et
une dameMadame de B. (historical), unidentified de notre connaissance,
personne n'était dans le secret. Tous deux présentèrent la nouvelle venueLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 comme la sœur du peintre Einar WegenerEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 et ma belle-sœur, ajoutant que
nous étions retenus à la maison par la grippe. La belle LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 eut un succès fou et décrocha d'une façon foudroyante
le cœur d'un officier de cavalerie, le comte de T.Colonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is
unidentified, âgé de cinquante-cinq à soixante ans, qui, de toute la
soirée, ne la quitta pas et l'accabla de compliments. Elle dut promettre de
le revoir; il tint à la reconduire jusque chez elle et prit congé d'elle
[Page 210]
à regret. Le surlendemain, comme je
travaillais seule dans mon atelier, on sonna à la porte; quelle ne fut pas ma
surprise en me trouvant face à face avec le monsieurColonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is
unidentified, mûr et correct, que LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 m'avait décrit comme son amoureux et qui se tenait sur
le seuil, un peu gêné, les bras chargés de fleurs. Les miens faillirent en
tomber!
(32) – N'est-ce pas ici que demeure Mlle Lily WegenerLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931? balbutia le pauvre hommeColonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is unidentified. Auriez-vous l'obligeance de lui dire que le colonel de T.Colonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is unidentified désirerait la voir.
(33) Je le priai d'entrer et de s'asseoir, expliquant que, malheureusement,
ma belle-sœurLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 était sortie et rentrerait
tard. Il en parut bouleversé et resta une bonne demi-heure à m'entretenir
des qualités physiques et morales de LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931.
Tout en approuvant, j'avais toutes les peines du monde à garder mon sérieux.
Je pris cependant l'initiative de lui apprendre que cette enfantLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 allait repartir bientót, ayant à régler des
affaires de famille au DanemarkDenmark is a Scandinavian country in northern Europe whose capital is Copenhagen.. Enfin
le comte de T.Colonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is
unidentified se retira, en
m'assurant qu'il ne tarderait pas à revenir. Il tint parole. Entretemps,
notre amie,
Mme de B.Madame de B. (historical), unidentified, qui avait
assisté au fameux dîner et au coup de foudre militaire, vint nous raconter
que le pauvre colonelColonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is
unidentified, de plus en plus
fou, ne songeait qu'à LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 et parlait même
de divorcer pour l'épouser. Aussi, quand il revint pour la voir, lui
annonçai-je qu'elle était partie subitement la veille, pour CopenhagueCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark. Le malheureux fut au désespoir.
Il se confia à BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, et lui dit son
étonnement de lui trouver si peu de ressemblance
[Page 211]
avec sa délicieuse sœur. « Peut-être
un rien dans le regard, mais c'est bien tout. » Il nous fallut des efforts
héroïques pour ne pas nous trahir et reconduire le colonelColonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is
unidentified, en gardant l'air qui convenait à la situation.
(34) Par la suite, nous fîmes envoyer à Mmede B.Madame de B. (historical), unidentified des cartes de CopenhagueCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark signées « LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 », où cette jeune personneLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 lui confirmait la longueur de son séjour et lui laissait entrevoir de vagues projets de mariage, tout cela pour calmer sa malheureuse victimeColonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is unidentified.
(35) Le temps fit heureusement son œuvre, et nous ne revîmes plus le comte de T.Colonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is unidentified
(36) GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener avait connu BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 adolescent, en
suivant les cours de dessin et de peinture à l'Académie des Beaux-ArtsThe Royal Danish Academy of Fine Arts (historical), founded in 1754 and located in
the Charlottenborg Palace in Copenhagen, it is the premier academy of arts in Denmark,
where the Wegeners both studied. de CopenhagueCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark. La jeune artisteGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener avait voué à l'étudiantEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 une profonde affection et il était devenu son
meilleur ami. GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener était très courtisée
et EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, violemment épris, dépérissait,
en se rendant compte qu'il ne serait jamais pour elle qu'un très cher ami et
confident. A
dix-sept ans, la jolie GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener eut une
déception amoureuse, à la suite de laquelle elle devint triste et
indifférente aux hommages de ses autres flirts. A ce moment, elle apprit que
le pauvre EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 se mourait d'amour pour
elle. Il souffrait de crises cardiaques et les médecins
déclaraient que cet état nerveux pouvait devenir fatal. Déjà meurtrie dans
son inclination, la jeune filleGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener ne put
supporter l'idée de perdre l'êtreEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 qui
lui était le plus cher, après sa mèreJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb). Elle courut au chevet de BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 lui dire qu'elle avait réfléchi
[Page 212]
et consentait à devenir sa femme.
L'effet fut magique et,
le jeune hommeEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, subitement remis, put
bientôt conduire à l'autel la blonde filleGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener du pasteur Got t lieb. Ces enfants de
dix-sept et vingt ans à peine, étaient d'une candeur puérile et le jeune
EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, aussi vierge que sa petite épouseGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, ne s'était jamais demandé
si, physiquement, il serait à la hauteur des devoirs que son nouvel état lui
imposait. Naïve, et ne sachant qu'imparfaitement ce que le mariage réserve
aux filles, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener ne s'étonna qu'à
moitié, en constatant combien douces et superficielles étaient les caresses
qu'elle recevait de son heureux épouxEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931.
Ils étaient pleinement satisfaits l'un de l'autre et, quand la jeune femmeGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener éprouvait certains soirs de
printemps quelque langueur qu'elle ne parvenait pas à définir, la vie en
commmun était si harmonieuse, si lisse et tendre, qu'elle n'y attachait
qu'une vague importance. Au bout de longs mois, tous deux constatèrent que
les joies sexuelles avaient été refusées à leur union, ce qui ne les empêcha
nullement de continuer à vivre en parfaite harmonie. Ils avaient les mêmes
goûts en art, la même conception de la vie; enfin, ils ne pouvaient, même un
instant, se passer l'un de l'autre. Ils s'aimaient et se disputaient comme
deux gosses et j'entends encore
Mme GottliebJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb)
s'écrier, lors d'une de ses visites à ParisParis (historical), capital of France : « Mais quand cesserez-vous donc d'être des enfants? »
Et GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener de
lui rèpondre: « Mais, mamanJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb), j'espère
bien jamais! »
(37) Depuis quelque temps, je remarquais avec angoisse,
[Page 213]
(ou plutôt on me l'avait fait
remarquer), que la silhouette de BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931,
déjà efféminée, devenait de plus en plus équivoque : ses vestons semblaient
plus pincés à la taille, sa poitrine se bombait, sa démarche ondulante
rappelait celle d'une odalisque; sa voix même prenait des inflexions
féminines. Mon mariEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini l'avait constaté
aussi et « on », c'est-à-dire ma famille, mon entourage, mes
connaissances,
enfin toute la tribu bienveillante des créatures qui se
plaisent à vous faire découvrir, avec une touchante sollicitude, les choses
désagréables qui auraient pu vous échapper. « On » s'étonnait, « on »
désapprouvait même nos relations et notre amitié avec un êtreEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 aussi nettement ambigu. Je parlai à
GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener de ce que j'avais observé;
elle me répondit qu'elle-même le constatait depuis longtemps, bien qu'elle
vécût avec EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, et s'en tourmentait
terriblement. « Mais le plus lamentable, ajouta-t-elle, est que BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 aussi s'en rend compte et en souffre
au-delà de tout ce que vous pouvez imaginer. Il s'aperçoit qu'on se retourne
dans la rue, que l'on rit quand il entre dans un autobus, et s'entend même
interpeller quelquefois d'une façon outrageante. Tout le monde le prend pour
un inverti, alors que vous savez, comme moi, que les hommes lui sont aussi
indifférents que sa première pantoufle. Savez-vous ce qui est arrivé,
l'autre soir, à un dîner chez Karen BramsonKaren Bramson (1875-1936), a Danish author? Nous étions une dizaine et comme il y avait des
Français, la conversation se tenait en cette langue. Brusquement, au milieu
du repas, KarenKaren Bramson (1875-1936), a Danish author
[Page 214]
BramsonKaren Bramson (1875-1936), a Danish author qui, vous le savez, dit sans
ménagement tout ce qui lui passe par la tête, crie à travers la table à BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 : « Vous, WegenerEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, naturellement, vous êtes pour hommes? » et EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, plein d'esprit comme d'habitude, lui
répond en souriant : « Non,
madame,
vous vous trompez, je suis lesbienne. »
(38) Je l'ai même envoyé consulter deux médecins, mais l'un l'a pris pour un fou, l'autre pour un pervers, en sorte qu'il est revenu plus déprimé qu'avant. Il commence même à éprouver des sortes de malaises tous les mois et, ce qu'il y a de plus curieux, c'est que son caractère et sa mentalité se féminisent encore plus que son être physique. Il n'est heureux qu'en LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 et passe, ainsi constumé, des après-midi entiers, lisant des poèmes, brodant, faisant de la pâtisserie ou jouant avec la petite chienne. Il dit qu'alors, il oublie tout et se sent dans son véritable élément. Seules, vous et moi pouvons comprendre cette situation, aussi n'en ai-je parlé à personne; je m'exposerais à ce qu'on nous tourne en ridicule, BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 et moi, ou à ce qu'on nous prenne, comme les médecins l'ont fait, pour des vicieux ou des détraqués. Vous devez sentir combien je suis désespérée de le voir ainsi souffrir et de n'y rien pouvoir... »
(39) Vers le printemps, l'état de BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 s'étant
sensiblement aggravé, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener décida de
passer quelques mois à RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy, espérant que
le changement de climat et de milieu lui ferait du bien. Ils partirent donc
et louèrent un petit appartement, avec atelier,
[Page 215]
dans la Ville EternelleRome (historical), capital of Italy.
Nous restâmes longtemps sous les
revoir
et les nouvelles que je recevais d'eux étaient rien moins que rassurantes :
EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 souffrait de plus en plus de
vertiges, de maux de tête et de dépression morale; GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener prévoyait un prompt retour à ParisParis (historical), capital of France, au cas où cet état de choses continuerait. Ce ne fut
qu'à la fin de l'automne que nous retrouvâmes nos
amis.
Ils nous invitèrent à dîner, dans un petit restaurant italien de leur
quartier.
(40) Le matin, je reçus un coup de téléphone de mon ami,le professeur W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948, — le célèbre gynécologue allemand — qui se trouvait de passage à ParisParis (historical), capital of France. Il n'était libre que ce soir-là et désirait beaucoup nous voir. Je décommandai donc les WegenerEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, en leur expliquant le cas. Vers quatre heures, nouveau coup de téléphone du practicienKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948, retenu par une panne de voiture, aux environs de ParisParis (historical), capital of France. Il était navré mais ne pourrait être de retour que très tard, après sa consultation, et notre soirée était dans l'eau.
(41) — Rattrapons notre dîner avec les Einar, dis-je à mon mariEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician, who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini.
(42) — Mais non, on les verra un autre jour, ils nous croiront fous de changer ainsi, à chaque instant.
(43) A
ce moment, j'eus l'intuition mystérieuse que nous devions, coûte que coûte,
voir nos amis ce même soir. C'était comme un ordre que je recevais,
l'influence d'une volonté supérieure à la mienne. J'expliquai à mon mariEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini que notre intimité avec
[Page 216]
les Wegener était telle qu'ils ne se
formaliseraient point d'un message. Je les prévins donc que nous passerions
quand même les prendre vers huit heures.
(44) Quoique préparés à trouver BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 changé, nous eûmes un affreux choc en le revoyant. Notre pauvre amiEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 n'était plus que l'ombre de lui-même, hâve, le teint terreux, les yeux enfoncés dans les orbites, entourés de grands cercles bistres, avec une expression désespérée que je n'oublierai jamais. Il fit d'héroïques efforts pour paraître gai pendant le repas, mais, dans son regard, persistait cet air de bête martyrisée que je ne pouvais supporter. N'y tenant plus, je pris GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener à part et lui confiai ma pénible impression.
(45) — J'allais vous en parler moi-même, me répondit-elle. J'en suis malade! Labouré de souffrances atroces et presque continuelles, le pauvre êtreEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 ne dort plus. Il sent ses forces décliner chaque jour et si on ne peut faire quelque chose pour le soulager, je crains le pire, car il n'en peut plus! Ses organes masculins s'atrophient de plus en plus, sa poitrine se développe, il endure des tortures chaque mois et je n'ose m'adresser aux médecins d'ici, après notre première expérience.
(46) A ce
moment, j'eus la vision distincte de la longue silhouette de mon ami,
le professeur W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 Son passage à
ParisParis (historical), capital of France m'apparut, non point comme une
coïncidence, mais comme le doigt de la destinée. Saisie d'une éloquence qui
ne m'était pas habituelle, j'exposai mon plan à GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener : téléphoner
[Page 217]
le lendemain matin au grand spécialisteKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948, lui expliquer le cas en
quelques mots, et obtenir un rendez-vous pour BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931. Réconfortée et remplie d'espoir, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener me promit de faire de son mieux auprès
de son mariEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, pour me l'envoyer le
lendemain matin. Elle eut cependant le plus grand mal à le décider : au
dernier moment, il voulait se dérober, ayant perdu confiance en toutes
choses.
(47) Les quelques détails que je donnai, par téléphone, au professeur W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 suffirent à éveiller son intérêt; il me fixa aussitôt un rendez-vous. EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 arriva chez moi bien à l'avance; il était extrêmement agité et je parvins difficilement à le calmer, à le convaincre que tout s'arrangerait, dès qu'il serait entre les mains de l'admirable spécialisteKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948.
(48) — Je ne voulais pas vous le dire devant GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, me dit-il, mais je suis décidé à me suicider si je ne
puis devenir ce que je suis réellement, une femme. Songez, ma chère
HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, que je ne suis plus qu'une
loque humaine, un déchet inutile. Malade physiquement et moralement
— je
ne puis même plus tenir un pinceau, ni faire la moindre chose pour aider GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener — je
ne resterai jamais à sa charge. Elle a été admirable pour moi, personne ne
peut savoir ou comprendre à quel point... sauf vous peut-être?... Je vous ai
promis, à toutes deux, de consulter ce grand médecinKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948. Ce sera ma dernière tentative; s'il ne peut rien, je
suis décidé à disparaître... ce sera un soulagement pour moi... et aussi
pour ma chère GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener... après le premier
chagrin passé. Je n'entraverai plus sa
[Page 218]
vie, comme je le fais depuis
longtemps. Dans mon cas, vivre serait une lâcheté. Regardez où j'en
suis!...
(49) Ce disant, il écarta sa chemise et découvrit les plus beaux seins de femme que j'aie jamais vus. J'en fus saisie et « réalisai » vraiment à cet instant tout ce qu'il venait de me dire.
(50) Quand nous arrivâmes chez mon ami, le professeur W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948ce fut moi qui servit d'interprète. Je dus lui expliquer, en allemand, la progression de la métamorphose d'EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 depuis l'origine. J'attendis dans une pièce voisine, pendant qu'il l'examinait. Il revint un quart d'heure plus tard, en proie à une agitation qui m'étonna chez un hommeKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 que je n'avais jamais vu qu'impassible.
(51) — Savez-vous, chère amieHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, que vous m'avez
amené un cas unique dans l'histoire de la science médicale, un cas attendu
pendant toute une existence sans jamais le rencontrer : votre amiEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 est le seul véritable hermaphrodite qui existe ou ait existé, car il a été
vraiment homme, un homme chétif,
débile, atrophié, mais un homme quand même, dans toute l'acception du terme.
En général, les autres êtres, auxquels on donne ce nom, ne sont pas de réels
hermaphrodites mais
seulement des hommes affligés d'une hernie inguinale, qui retient leurs
organes à l'intérieur du corps, en sorte qu'un peut les prendre pour des
femmes. A la
suite d'un choc physique, d'un accident ou de tout autre phénomène de ce
genre, le sexe suspendu descend brusquement et occupe sa
[Page 219]
place normale : la soi-disant femme devient alors un homme,
mais, en réalité, elle l'a toujours été sans qu'on puisse le soupçonner,
tandis que WegenerEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, lui, a été d'abord
un homme et évolue actuellement vers le sexe
féminin, ce qui est tout différent des cas d'hermaphrodisme ordinaires. Il
représente donc le premier type parfait de l'androgyne.
Actuellement, il a en lui les deux sexes et c'est le combat qui se livre
entre eux qui martyrise ainsi ce pauvre être. Si l'on n'intervient pas, il
succombera sous peu, que ce soit par la violence du conflit ou par sa propre
main, car il est incapable de supporter longtemps ses atroces souffrances.
Je ne vois qu'une issue : le débarrasser de ce qui reste de son premier sexe,
et greffer aux ovaires
— qu'il
possède certainement
— des
ovaires neufs, en bon état, puis, plus tard, quand il sera capable de le
supporter, faire une troisième et dernière opération, qui ouvrira une voie
normale aux fonctions génitales. Je devine aisément les assiduités
masculines dont votre ami a dû être harcelé, car les hermaphrodites ont une puissance de séduction sexuelle aiguë
sur les hommes, à leur insu. Tout ceci vous fera
comprendre une chose, qu'on ignore en général et qui cause tant d'injustices
et de calomnies dans notre impitoyable société : beaucoup
d'invertis sont des êtres qui possèdent un sexe
masculin dans lequel se trouvent des ovaires, à la place des testicules. Il
en est de même pour beaucoup de lesbiennes, qui ont des
testicules à la place où devraient se trouver
[Page 220]
leurs ovaires. Ces malheureux
souffrent donc injustement du mépris et du dégoût publics, alors que leurs
penchants sont
– somme
toute
– normaux
et non vicieux et pervers, comme on se plaît à le leur faire sentir.
(52) Je prescrirai d'abord à votre amiEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 un traitement, pour le préparer à surmonter l'épreuve qui l'attend. Vers le début de mars, je le préviendrai et il faudra qu'il vienne immédiatement à BerlinBerlin (historical), capital of Germany où mon collègue, le professeur G.Erwin Gohrbandt (1890–1965), a Berlin surgeon who performed the first operation on Lili Elvenes in 1930, pratiquera la première opération. Dès qu'il en sera remis, il viendra – ou plutôt elle viendra – à la FrauenklinikMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948." de DresdeDresden (historical), city in Germany, où je ferai la deuxième intervention, par laquelle s'affirmera son véritable sexe. Qu'il ait donc bon courage, en attendant; je suis d'ailleurs certain qu'il l'aura, car on ne peut que s'incliner devant sa vaillance. Puis, s'adressant à EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 lui-même : « Au revoir donc, cher monsieur, en attendant de pouvoir vous dire : Bonjour, chère mademoiselle! »
(53) Ce fut un EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 transfiguré que je ramenai à sa femmeGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener! Je n'ai jamais vu pareil changement en si peu de temps. Le visage de mon amiEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 avait passé de la plus déchirante angoisse à la plus parfaite sérénité, comme ces cieux qui, assombris par un orage, s'éclaircissent tout à coup, illuminés d'une rayonnante clarté.
(54) Pendant les deux mois qui suivirent, le pauvre BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, comme touché par la baguette d'un magicien, reprenait des forces morales et physiques; GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener me redisait souvent sa joie et son soulagement.
Page 221(55) Ce fut par un beau matin de mars que, seules toutes deux, selon son désir, nous l'accompagnâmes à la gare du Nord. Il s'installa dans son compartiment et, galant comme toujours, céda son coin réservé à une jeune femme, qui l'en remercia d'un sourire charmant. Son « Merci, monsieur » nous fit rire, nous savions que BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 portait pour la dernière fois son costume masculin, ce dont il n'avait cessé de se réjouir pendant le trajet en taxi. GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener pensait avoir le temps de terminer une commande très importante et de rejoindre son mariEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 avant l'intervention, mais elle dut partir précipitamment, dans la même semaine, avertie par dépêche que « tout s'était admirablement passé ». A peine arrivée à BerlinBerlin (historical), capital of Germany, EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, examiné par Marcus HirschfeldMagnus Hirschfeld (1868–1935), a German physician and one of the most influential sexologists of the time; Einar Wegener was examined at his Institute in March 1930 et quelques autres somnités berlinoises, avait subi, de la main du professeur G.Erwin Gohrbandt (1890–1965), a Berlin surgeon who performed the first operation on Lili Elvenes in 1930, l'ablation qui devait faire de lui une LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 définitive.
(56) GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener emportait du linge de femme, une robe de chambre rose et tout un arsenal de fards et de parfums : de quoi réjouir LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 et lui donner son véritable aspect féminin.
(57) En arrivant à la cliniqueErwin Gohrbandt's private clinic (historical) at Augsburger Str. 66, Berlin
la voyageuseGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener fut tout d'abord frappée du
changement de voix de son ex-mariEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931.
L'opération avait suffi pour en transformer le timbre et ce fut un joli
soprano qui l'accueillit. L'opéréeLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931reposait
pâle, mais radieuse, sur ses oreillers, après avoir supporté vaillamment les
souffrances qui l'avaient délivrée
–
enfin!
–de
sa chrysalide tant détestée. Elle était choyée, gâtée,
[Page 222]
entourée de fleurs, de prévenances.
Les quelques amis scandinaves,qui
se trouvaient à BerlinBerlin (historical), capital of Germany, venaient la voir
quotidiennement. Elle était l'idole de la cliniqueErwin Gohrbandt's private clinic (historical) at Augsburger Str. 66, Berlin, on n'y parlait que d'elle, de son courage, de sa
douceur et de son aventure extraordinaire.
(58) GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener eut vite fait de farder sa chère filleLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931,(car c'est ainsi qu'elle la considérait désormais), de la coiffer, de lui passer la chemise de nuit et la matinée de soie rose que j'avais depuis longtemps promises à BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 pour LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 et qu'elle lui apportait de ma part. On juge de la stupéfaction du professeur G.Erwin Gohrbandt (1890–1965), a Berlin surgeon who performed the first operation on Lili Elvenes in 1930 en pénétrant dans la chambre, ce soir même, lorsqu'il aperçut, à la place de son maladeLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931, une ravissante demoiselleLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 toute pomponnée, parfumée et frisée pour le recevoir.
(59) Les semaines qui suivirent furent pour la pauvre LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 un rêve enchanteur : pour sa première sortie, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener lui fit la surprise d'un beau manteau de fourrure et l'emmena ensuite dans les magasins, choisir tout ce qui manquait encore à son trousseau.
(60) Comme il était convenu, j'eus les honneurs de la première lettre de LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931. L'écriture en était tellement différente que
j'eus peine à croire, en la décachetant, qu'elle était écrite de sa main : à
la place des épais jambages d'EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931,
couraient sur le papier des traits élégants et légers, mais ce qui me
surprit plus que tout, ce fut le style de LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931, virginal, sensible, délicat, un véritable style de
jeune fille, et de jeune fille sentimentale : « BerlinBerlin (historical), capital of Germany. 10 mars 1930.
[Page 223]
Chère et grande amieHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe. Je suis si ravie de votre lettre et j'embrasse votre
nom chéri. Je suis si heureuse mais tellement fatiguée qu'il m'est
impossible d'écrire. L'opération a duré une heure et j'ai hurlé pendant
des heures après (avec une voix claire comme celle d'Elisabeth SchumannElisabeth Schumann (1888-1952), a German opera singer, selon l'avis de
mon superbe chirurgienErwin Gohrbandt (1890–1965), a Berlin surgeon who performed the first operation on
Lili Elvenes in 1930).
BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 a vécu et LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 est bientôt une fille avec son passeport
en règle. Le printemps chante dans mon cœur et je pleure de bonheur et
je suis sans peur devant toutes les douleurs qui m'attendent. Je vous
adore. LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931.
(61) P. S. — BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 a fêté l'enterrement de sa vie de garçon. »
(62) Et encore, le 15 mars : « Tout le monde me gâte ici et m'appelle LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931. Ils me font beaucoup de compliments surtout pour mes jambes. Ça me va très bien. Je ne serai certainement jamais une femme de tête. Ne trouvez-vous pas, chère HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with a chapter on Lili Elbe, que je dois avoir des ongles roses, et pas rouges, pour la grande opération de DresdeDresden (historical), city in Germany? Maintenant je ne me retiens plus de montrer ma joie quand je me sens trop heureuse. BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 s'estompe de plus en plus et le professeur W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 va lui porter le coup de grâce. »
(63) Quelques semaines plus tard, deux élégantes jeunes femmes débarquaient
à la FrauenklinikMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik
in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948." de DresdeDresden (historical), city in Germany et se présentaient devant le professeur W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948,
[Page 224]
qui, ne connaissant pas encore GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener et ayant quitté un BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 cadavérique et en veston, n'arrivait pas à
identifier les séduisantes créatures qui se tenaient devant lui, en
riant.
(64) La FrauenklinikMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948." est une véritable ville contenant cinq cents lits et tous les perfectionnements modernes. LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 fut installée dans la plus belle chambre et, là encore, elle devint le point culminant de l'intérêt général. La seconde opération fut longue et grave. Elle en sortit très faible, mais très heureuse, car son cœur et sa nouvelle âme de jeune fille s'étaient donnés à son sauveur, à celui qui l'avait libérée d'une existence de martyr, pour lui ouvrir les portes dorées de la vie et de l'espérance.
(65) DresdeDresden (historical), city in Germany, 7 avril
1930 : « Toute ma vie ne suffira pas pour vous remercier
de m'avoir envoyée chez cet homme extraordinaire, ce génie bienfaisant
qui m'a donné une nouvelle vie. J'adore mon cher professeur W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 ... je l'aime, mais avec un
mélange de respect, comme s'il était plutôt un dieu tout-puissant. Chère
HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, vous comprenez votre
petite LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 quand je vous dis que je n'ai
jamais vu ses yeux, parce que je n'ai jamais osé le regarder. Je
voudrais souvent lui dire quelque chose, mais je n'arrive jamais plus
loin que de sourire bêtèment et dire : « Oui, maître ». Je voudrais qu'il
soit un pacha ou sultan pour être son esclave. FrauenklinikMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik
in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948." est un paradis
terrestre!
j'aime même mes souffrances ici. Voilà où j'en »
[Page 225]
suis! J'ai une nouvelle paire
d'ovaires qui se comportent comme des petits fauves dans mon ventre
endolori. Ma chambre est la seule qui ait une grande glace, quand
Il me donnera le droit de me lever, je pourrai me
mettre devant. GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener veut faire
Son portrait. Quel est donc ce pouvoir magique qui
influence toutes celles qui l'approchent. Il y a une charmante jeune
fille qui vient nettoyer dans ma chambre, qui m'a dit : « Je nettoie
comme pour sauver ma vie, si jamais Il voyait
un grain de poussière et s'il me faisait un reproche, j'en mourrais! »
HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe comme c'est fantastique, d'une vie
qui s'en allait vers la terre et la fin, comme une récompense, il a créé
une nouvelle vie débordante d'espérance, d'amour et de printemps. C'est
l'œuvre d'un dieu! Quel déchirement, le jour où je devrai quitter cette
clinique, dans sa forêt de bouleaux blancs. J'ai rêvé qu' Il continuerait de m'opérer jusqu'au moment où il ne
Lui resterait que mon cœur tremblant entre
Ses mains si douces et fines. HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, vous avez un cœur d'or que vous
dépensez sans cesse pour le bonheur des autres. J'espère que vous ne
regretterez jamais tout ce que vous avez fait pour votre petite
LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931. Moi qui ai un peu peur de mes
premiers pas dans la vie, je me sens protégée par votre amitié.
»
(66) De son côté, le célèbre chirurgienKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 se
montrait touché par la douceur et le courage de sa petite malade et lui
témoignait des sentiments quasi-paternels,
[Page 226]
auxquels venait s'ajouter l'intérêt
professionnel pour ce cas passionnant entre tous. Le professeur W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 avait de charmants égards pour GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, dont il appréciait la conduite admirable
dans une situation aussi particulière. Il lui avait accordé le privilège de
monter chez lui se reposer, ou peindre, dans son confortable living-room. En
gage de reconnaissance pour tout ce qu'il avait fait, elle entreprit son
portrait, en blouse blanche de chirurgien. Les infirmières et les servantes
étaient aux petits soins pour l'opérée, afin de plaire au maîtreKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948, qu'elles
entouraient toutes d'une adoration craintive, mêlée de respect. Lui, se
mouvait dans ces ondes d'amour et d'admiration féminine, comme un sultan
dans son sérail; la dévotion de tout ce personnel était devenue une sorte
d'extase religieuse.
(67) Un après-midi, comme LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 faisait la sieste, étendue sur une chaise-longue, dans le parc de la clinique, une vieille dame s'approcha d'elle et engagea la conversation : « Comment allez-vous maintenant, petite madame? Vous me semblez avoir meilleure mine et vous serez bientôt tout à fait remise de votre accouchement. Ma fille, elle, commence à se lever. Et votre bébé, est-ce un garçon ou une fille? »
(68) – L'un et l'autre, répondit LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 sans sourciller, le Bon Dieu m'a envoyé des jumeaux. »
(69) LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 quitta la clinique et son cher seigneur avec regret et alla finir de se remettre dans les montagnes de la SaxeSaxony (historical), a state in eastern Germany, en compagnie de GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener.
Page 227(70) « Il nous a envoyées, pour quelques jours, dans l'ErzgebirgeErzgebirge (historical), mountain range in eastern Germany, entre la SaxeSaxony (historical), a state in eastern Germany et la BohêmeBohemia (historical), a region of the Czech Republic, mais il fait si froid ici que nous allons quitter ces lieux où nous grelottons, dans nos petites robes d'été. »
(71) Elles revinrent donc prendre congé du professeurKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 et partirent pour CopenhagueCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark, y faire annuler leur mariage et mettre en règle
les papiers de LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931. Celle-ci obtint du
roi de DanemarkChristian Carl Frederik Albert Alexander Vilhelm (historical) (1870 – 1947), King
of Denmark from 1912-1947 la transformation de son nom de
famille en celui d'Elbe, qu'elle avait choisi
d'après le fleuve qui arrose DresdeDresden (historical), city in Germany,
témoin de sa renaissance. LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 fit un long
séjour dans sa famille, tremblant quand elle sortait, craignant d'être
reconnue, redoutant aussi le moment où sa métamorphose serait signalée, la
rendant ainsi la proie des journalistes, qui feraient d'elle un phénomène
national. Elle ne voulait plus toucher une palette, ni quoi que ce fut
pouvant lui rappeler BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931. Elle passait
ses journées à coudre, à se regarder dans la glace, à broder, à se faire les
ongles. Elle était devenue pudique à l'excès — alors que BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 se plaisait à raconter les anecdotes les
plus grivoises — elle rougissait pour un rien et, contrairement à sa
première incarnation (EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 était un
parfait athée), était devenue d'une piété édifiante, d'un mysticisme
intense. Son second frère, HolgerHolger Wegener (b. 1880), Einar Wegener’s brother, et
sa belle-sœur, avec lesquels BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 s'était
toujours bien entendu, furent envers LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931
d'une bonté touchante et compréhensive et l'accueillirent de tout leur cœur.
Exténuée par la tension morale de ces derniers mois et sachant sa petite
LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 en
[Page 228]
bonnes mains, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener céda aux instances
de sa mèreJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb), qui voulait l'emmener se reposer en ItalieItaly is a European country whose capital is Rome., et partit avec elle pour RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy. Elles descendirent dans une pension de famille tenue
par une Danoise, qu'elles connaissaient. GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener eut là toutes les peinnes
du
monde à se distraire et à sortir avec ses amis italiens, car, depuis
l'annulation du mariage,
Mme GottliebJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb), se
croyant revenue au temps où sa fille était adolescente, ne lui laissait
aucune liberté et veillait sur elle comme un dragon. La vieille dame,
désirant connaître PompéiPompeii (historical), an ancient Roman city, décida d'y
aller passer, avec sa fille, une huitaine de jours. Constamment sous la
tutelle maternelle, la jeune femme cherchait le moyen de s'en affranchir,
pour pouvoir, enfin, se détendre. Le matin du retour, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, désemparée, se promenait dans le vieux
NaplesNaples (historical), city in Italy,
quand elle aperçut une petite église qui l'attirait mystérieusement. Elle y
entra et, s'approchant de l'autel de la Vierge, elle la supplia de lui venir
en aide, de la protéger et de guider sa vie vers un être loyal et bon, qui
l'aimerait sincèrement et avec lequel elle pourrait partager le reste de son
existence. Elle sortit soulagée et, le soir, dans le train qui les ramenait
à RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy, elle prit la résolution de laisser
sa mère retourner seule au DanemarkDenmark is a Scandinavian country in northern Europe whose capital is Copenhagen. et
de prolonger son séjour en ItalieItaly is a European country whose capital is Rome.. A la
pension de famille, un volumineux courrier l'attendait. Comme elle se
dirigeait vers le salon de l'hôtel pour le dépouiller, une silhouette
masculine se leva pour la saluer. Elle reconnut un officier aviateur, qui lui
avait été présenté, avant son
[Page 229]
voyage à NaplesNaples (historical), city in Italy.
« Permettez-moi de déposer mes hommages à vos pieds, madame, et de vous
exprimer ma joie de votre retour. Je craignais que vous ayez quitté
définitivement RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy, et cette maison avait
perdu son charme pendant votre absence. » GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener répondit quelques mots et accepta une cigarette. Après
cette première conversation, le capitaine PortaFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband guettait chaque soir le retour de la jeune femme, et
leur sympathie mutuelle s'accentuait de plus en plus. Le jour du départ de
Mme GottliebJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb),
GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener eut la surprise de trouver
l'officier l'attendant à la sortie de la gare. « Je voulais m'assurer que
vous me resteriez », lui dit-il d'une voix émue. Gagnée par la flamme de ce
beau et sympathique garçon, elle consentit à l'écouter. Ils découvrirent
qu'ils s'entendaient à merveille, avaient les mêmes goûts et, quand
Fernando PortaFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband lui demandaa de devenir
sa femme, elle accepta de tout son ceur, après lui avoir raconté son passé
et l'aventure, si fantastique, qui l'avait assombri. « Vous m'êtes maintenant
doublement chère, lui répondit-il, et une admiration pleine de respect se
mêle à ma tendresse; LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 sera notre fille.
Je comprends que vous ne veuillez pas l'abandonner. Elle aura toujours sa
chambre chez nous, sa place à notre foyer. »
(72) Quand GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener nous apprit ses fiançailles,
j'en éprouvai une grande joie. Elle recevait enfin la récompense qu'elle
avait si bien méritée, le bonheur que je lui avais toujours souhaité.
Pendant un court voyage à RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy, mon mari
eut l'occasion de faire la connaissance de « NandoFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband » et le trouva des
[Page 230]
plus charmants
Il appartenait à l'une de meilleures familles livournaises et venait d'être
nommé vice-consul à MarrakechMarrakech (historical), a city in Morocco. Il s'y
rendit, au début de février, pour préparer l'installation tandis que
GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener retournait à CopenhagueCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark pour régler ses affaires,
organiser son exposition de peinture et passer quelques semaines avec
LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931. Elle voulut aussi, au cours de ce
séjour, se convertir à la religion catholique, pour partager la foi de son
futur mari. Elle le voulait surtout, par reconnaissance envers la Vierge,
qui avait exaucé sa prière.
(73) A son arrivée, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener fut touchée jusqu'au
fond du cœur par la joie débordante avec laquelle LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 l'accueillit et accueillit aussi sa nouvelle félicité.
Le temps passa vite et délicieusement, tandis que GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener échafaudait mille projets d'avenir, que LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 écoutait avec un mélancolique ravissement :
au début d'avril, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener rejoindrait son
fiancéFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband à MarrakechMarrakech (historical), a city in Morocco, où ils se
marieraient aussitôt; dès les premiers jours de juin, LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 partirait pour ParisParis (historical), capital of France; elle passerait deux semaines chez nous, avant de
s'embarquer pour le MarocMorocco (historical), a country in northern Africa, où l'heureux
couple l'attendrait. Le temps s'écoula rapidement et bientôt, vint le moment
où un groupe d'amis accompagna GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener à
la gare. Elle était radieuse, malgré une ombre de regret, à la pensée de
laisser derrière elle la pauvre LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931, mais
ce n'était qu'une ombre, en effet, car ne devait-elle pas la rejoindre, et
deux mois sont si vite passés, surtout quand on est heureux. Les deux femmes
s'embrassèrent une dernière fois : « A bientôt, petite LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931, à bientôt, à
[Page 231]
MarrakechMarrakech (historical), a city in Morocco » « A bientôt, chère
GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, à toujours! »
(74) Un coup de sifflet, le train s'ébranle, les mouchoirs s'agitent; longtemps, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener suit des yeux la silhouette élancée de sa fille bien-aimée et, au moment où le train décrit une courbe qui la dérobe à sa vue, elle éprouve une angoisse soudaine et déchirante, un serrement de cœur, comme si elle voyait LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 pour la dernière fois!...
(75) Avril, mai, juin... Je commençai à préparer l'arrivée de LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931. J'annonçai, avec ménagement, à ma petite fille, la mort de son ami BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, qu'elle aimait tendrement. Je séchai ses larmes et tâchai de la calmer en lui annonçant que la sœur d'EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931, allait venir chez nous pour quelques jours et qu'elle ressemblait tant à son pauvre frère, qu'elle le remplacerait sûrement dans son affection, puis, j'écrivis à LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 de ne pas manquer de se mettre en grand deuil pour son arrivée.
(76) Ayant ainsi enterré définitivement le pauvre BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, je préparai la chambre de LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931. Pour flatter sa coquetterie, je fis mettre au lit des draps brodés, au mur une grande glace, puis, j'éparpillai mille petits riens : bonbons, colliers, parfums, rubans, destinés à lui faire plaisir. Je commandai ses fleurs préférées.
(77) La veille du jour où elle devait arriver,
quel
ne furent pas notre étonnement et notre déception en recevant la lettre
suivante : « Ma très chère HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, je suis partie de CopenhagueCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark mercredi matin pour ParisParis (historical), capital of France. De BerlinBerlin (historical), capital of Germany,
le soir, j'ai téléphoné à
[Page 232]
mon IdoleKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948,
à DresdeDresden (historical), city in Germany. Puis je suis venue jeudi
soir à FrauenklinikMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik
in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948.". Une heure
après, il avait décidé de m'opérer à nouveau. Je suis si fatiguée du
traitement préparatoire que je subis, que je peux à peine écrire.
Peut-être la surprise et un petit peu de peur y sont pour quelque chose,
— car je sais que c'est très sérieux cette fois. Quand je dis que j'ai
peur, c'est plutôt pour lui, qui est superbe de
courage et qui n'épargne rien pour me rendre heureuse. Ainsi, je pourrai
rester quelques mois auprès de lui et ça vaut
toutes les douleurs du monde! Je vous prie donc de me pardonner si je ne
viens pas tout de suite à ParisParis (historical), capital of France mais,
devant lui, j'oublie tout. J'étais au
DanemarkDenmark is a Scandinavian country in northern Europe whose capital is Copenhagen., devenue une personne
pas trop timide et, pendant quelques instants, j'ai pu lui parler librement; mais ça n'a pas duré, et il ne reste
de moi qu'une petite chose humble devant ce grand maître adoréKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948. Je suis
déjà couchée et quoiqu'il ne me l'ait pas dit, je sais que l'opération
sera pour demain matin et qu'elle sera très compliquée. Même la mort me
paraît douce ici où on garde toujours mon cœur, mais je comprends que la
mort serait comme une trahison envers lui.
Donc, voilà un petit retard légal de mon arivée à ParisParis (historical), capital of France chez vous, chère amie mais, quand je viendrai, je
serai à marier et qui sait si un beau jour je n'aurai pas aussi des
enfants? »
(78) GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener reçut une lettre dans le même
esprit et non seulement elle en conçut une violente déception, mais encore,
elle fut saisie, en la lisant, d'une légitime fureur. N'avait-elle pas
recommandé mille
[Page 233]
fois à LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931, lors de son séjour à CopenhagueCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark, de prendre au moins une année de repos, avant
de se faire opérer à nouveau! Elle le lui avait fait jurer, redoutant que
l'attraction que le professeur W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948
exerçait sur la malade, n'incitât celle-ci à désirer l'intervention
chirurgicale, pour se retrouver plus tôt dans son sillage adoré. Avec cela,
impossible d'agir, même par dépêche, car, d'après la date, LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 devait être sur la table d'opération au
moment où GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener lisait la lettre. En
proie à un véritable désespoir, à la rage qu'on éprouve devant un fait
accompli, elle ouvrit la porte de la chambre qu'elle avait préparée pour
LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931, avec toute sa tendresse. En y
entrant, malgré la chaleur torride qui régnait à MarrakechMarrakech (historical), a city in Morocco dans cette saison, elle fut pénétrée d'un froid
glacial et il lui sembla que la pièce était plongée dans une lumière
verdâtre; sous la blancheur de la moustiquaire, elle sentit la présence d'un
mort. Elle recula, saisie d'un frisson
et, son mari, survenu
quelques instants plus tard, parvint difficilement à calmer ses
craintes.
(79) A DresdeDresden (historical), city in Germany, l'opération, comme toutes les
opérations ou presque, avait bien réussi, mais la pauvre LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 souffrait comme une damnée et n'arrivait pas
à reprendre des forces. Le professeur W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 dut alors se rendre compte que l'organisme de sa malade ne
résisterait pas à cette dernière épreuve et, se sentant impuissant à la
sauver, il espaça de plus en plus ses visites. L'adoration passionnée de
LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 pour son chirurgien était devenue
son unique raison d'exister; aussi, privée de sa présence, ne
s'efforça-t-elle
[Page 234]
plus de réagir et cessa-t-elle de lutter
pour recouvrer la santé. Elle fut obsédée par la pensée de lui avoir servi
uniquement de terrain d'expérience. Les vacances survenant, le professeur
quitta la clinique pour prendre un repos rendu indispensable par le
surmenage de sa profession; ce lui fut aussi un soulagement de ne plus
sentir son cœur se serrer quand, pénétrant dans la chambre de LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 il se
rendait compte que, malgré ce qu'elle avait supporté et ce que lui-même
avait tenté, la pauvre créature était condamnée. Ce départ acheva de
désespérer la malheureuse fille et d'augmenter en elle l'amertume d'avoir
servi de cobaye à l'être qu'elle aimait plus que
sa vie, et elle se laissa mourir.
(80) Nous apprîmes tout cela par la suite, car la petite infirmière, qui avait
soigné LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 jusqu'à la fin, raconta son
calvaire à GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, quand celle-ci se
rendit à DresdeDresden (historical), city in Germany, un an plus tard. Parmi
ses affreuses souffrances physiques et morales, l'héroïque fille n'avait
pensé qu'à une chose : que GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener n'en sût
rien et ne fût pas troublée dans son bonheur. Elle-même, au prix de quels
efforts, lui cachait son véritable état, en lui écrivant des lettres pleines
de joie et d'espoir de rapide guérison. Le
Dr F., assistant du maîtreKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948,
homme plein de cœur et de pitié, avait fait ce qu'il avait pu pour adoucir
les dernières semaines de la pauvre petite malade, venant la voir à tout
instant, lui envoyant sa femme, qui égayait sa chambre de fleurs et lui
apportait leur petit singe pour la distraire. Dans les derniers
[Page 235]
jours d'août, sentant que son martyre
allait bientôt prendre fin, LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 avait
demandé le notaire pour rédiger son testament. Elle laissait le peu qu'elle
possédait à GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener. Elle demandait à sa
petite infirmière de la bien parer après sa mort, coiffée et maquillée comme
Mme GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener
aimait à le faire, et en souvenir d'elle.
(81) « Quand je mourrai que l'on me mette, / Avant de clouer mon cercueil, / Un peu de rouge à la pommette, / Un peu de noir au bord de l'œil. »
(82) Comme dans la « Coquetterie Posthume » de Théophile GautierThéophile Gautier (1811-1872), a French novelist, author of Mademoiselle de Maupin (1835), in which the female protagonist, disguised as a man, seduces both a young woman and her lover.
(83) Elle avait même recommandé qu'on mit du vernis rose sur ses ongles.
(84) Au début de septembre, elle écrivit péniblement à GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener qu'elle allait beaucoup mieux et se faisait une joie de pouvoir, sous peu, les rejoindre, NandoFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband et elle, à MarrakechMarrakech (historical), a city in Morocco. A moi-même, elle écrivit :
(85) « Je commence à me lever et pourrai bientôt faire quelques pas dans le jardin. Je pense avec bonheur au jour proche où je pourrai partir pour ParisParis (historical), capital of France et aux heureux moments que je passerai parmi vous tous, qui m'êtes si chers, à l'instant où je pourrai vous embrasser et vous dire toute ma gratitude d'avoir connu, grâce à votre intermédiaire, ma vraie vie, ma vie de femme. Soyez bénie pour cela, ma chère HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with a chapter on Lili Elbe. »
Page 236(86) Malgré la défense formelle d'informer qui que ce fût, la petite infirmière avait écrit, en cachette, toute la vérité à Holger WegenerHolger Wegener (b. 1880), Einar Wegener’s brother, le frère que LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 aimait tant. La fin était maintenant trop proche pour prévenir GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener, tant le déclin avait été rapide. Ce fut, pour la mourante, une grande et dernière joie de revoir son frère. Elle se sentit en paix, entourée d'une réelle affection et s'éteignit doucement, sa main dans la sienne, la pensée au loin, au-delà de la mer, vers cette terre d'AfriqueAfrica is a continent south of Europe. Gerda Wegener lived in Morocco in northern Africa with her second husband. qu'elle ne devait pas connaître...
(87) Sous une dalle de pierre blanche, qui porte pour toute inscription :
(88) LILY ELBELili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931
(89) 12 septembre 1931
(90) reposent les restes de la petite LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931, mais son âme, pure et belle, contemple avec ravissement le bonheur de celle qu'elle a le plus chérie. C'est là sa récompense d'avoir tant souffert et d'avoir tant aimé.
(91) Si — témoin si proche de cette histoire — j'ai tenu à en faire le récit
exact, c'est pour anéantir tout ce qui a été publié sur cette pénible
aventure. Dans une intention malsaine — ou burlesque — on a essayé d'avilir
deux êtres d'élite, dont la
[Page 237]
qualité d'âme et l'élévation de
sentiments pourraient servir d'exemple à bien des humains, surtout à ceux
qui les ont si injustement calomniés.
(92) Je crois ainsi me rendre digne d'une mémoire qui m'est profondément chère et d'une amitié que je place parmi les plus belles que je possède.
Translation
Page 198HE AND SHE
(01) It was near the end of the year 1916 that I met them. My fiancéEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician, who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini was then fighting in the Italian army, on the DolomitesDolomites Mountain Range (historical), a mountain range in Italy front. During his rest periods he was writing fairy tales for our future children. Since he appreciated the talent of the Danish artist, Gerda WegenerGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener, whose drawings appeared in La Vie Parisienne that I sent to him regularly, he asked me to approach her about doing the illustrations of his tales. I knew that she had done a very pretty cover for a book by Maurice MagreMaurice Magre (1877-1941), a French author, and so I asked my old friend to put me in touch. That is how, several days later, we came to ring at the door of a studio on the rue de Lille.the Wegeners’ studio (historical), located on rue de Lille in Paris
(02) We entered a large tastefully arranged room: antique furniture, Spanish
shawls, vases of flowers and the paintings of the Scandinavian couple,
because the husbandEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 was also a painter.
[Page 199]
An accomplished landscape painter, he excelled in perspective. GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener and Einar WegenerEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 offered us chairs and they sat down across from us on
a large black sofa, decorated with variously colored cushions. Thus, side by
side, they reminded me of characters in AndersenHans Christian Andersen (1805-1875), a famous Danish author known for his fairy tales’s tales, especially the ones in The Snow Queen: Gerda WegenerGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener,
so blonde, so fair, personified for me the other Gerda,
the one who went off, risking her life, in search of her beloved
Kaj in the enchanted palace, while EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 was an exact replica of
Kaj, with a mischievous smile that played on his
well-drawn lips. The young artistGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener wore
her hair drawn back in a chignon on her neck, and two rolls, similar to
eighteenth-century hammers, adorned her temples; a black velvet ribbon
further brought out the whiteness of her neck. In a nearby cage, two
inseparable love birds — the one acid green and the other green ash — playfully
hit each other. They seemed to be a living symbol of their owners, who one
felt were tenderly united, inseparable as well. A similar clarity lit the
golden pupils of EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931’s eyes and
GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener’s cerulean blue gaze. One had
the feeling that their clarity was the very reflection of their pure soul,
and I was drawn to them with a fondness that would soon transform into an
abiding friendship.
(03) We talked about our reason for being there, and GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener seemed willing to do the work.
[Page 200]
After admiring the
works of the two artists, it was agreed that she would write that very
evening to my fiancéEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini, to come to an
agreement with him, and they decided to meet the day of our marriage. During
the reception that followed the marriage ceremony, I presented the young
couple to my husbandEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini; as with me, they
also became friends. We saw each other again in two days, for a long time
while having tea at the Boulangerie ViennoiseBoulangerie Viennoise (historical), a Viennese bakery in Paris; it was there that all the details of the volume
were decided.
(04) We left that same evening for our honeymoon in RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy.
(05) Upon my return, five months later, we took up again our friendly relations that became more and more cordial and affectionate. I had just lost my mother and was expecting my first childJoselyn Allatini (1918-1947), daughter of Hélène Kann Allatini. My Scandinavian friends embraced me and I found great comfort in their affection on days when, without news of my husbandEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician, who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini, they increased their attention and tried to distract me as best as they could, to turn my thoughts away from my anxiety.
(06) In May 1918, the Supreme War Council of the Allied Armies was formed at
VersaillesVersailles (historical), a royal palace outside Paris. General Nichola de RobilantGeneral Nicolis di Robilant (historical), likely Mario Nicolis di Robilant (1855-1943),
an Italian General in WWI, my husbandEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini’s commander and old friend of the
family, was appointed to represent ItalyItaly is a European country whose capital is Rome..
Upon his arrival, he came to see me, accompanied by his aide-de-camp
Count Mario di CarrobioCount Mario di Carrobio (historical), unidentified but possibly Count Mario Gabrielli
di Carpegna (1856-1924), an Italian soldier and politician, as
handsome as a young god, cloaked in the superb blue cape worn by cavalry
officers. Hardly into our conversation the adorable generalGeneral Nicolis di Robilant (historical), likely Mario Nicolis di Robilant (1855-1943),
an Italian General in WWI
[Page 201]
asked me with a mischievous air: "What
would you say if EricEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini were named to
VersaillesVersailles (historical), a royal palace outside Paris? Would you be
annoyed?"
(07) I almost threw my arms around his neck.
(08) Several days later my husbandEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician, who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini arrived in ParisParis (historical), capital of France to take up his new post and shortly thereafter I got settled in VersaillesVersailles (historical), a royal palace outside Paris with my baby girlJoselyn Allatini (1918-1947), daughter of Hélène Kann Allatini. We led a delightful life getting together with other young couples from all over the world, with many of whom we formed lasting friendships.
(09) The Wegeners came to visit us often in the charming villa that we had rented
and decided to spend the end of summer and a part of autumn in VersaillesVersailles (historical), a royal palace outside Paris. They took a small apartment on
the rue des RéservoirsHôtel des Reservoirs (historical), at that time a hotel on rue des Réservoirs near
the park of Versailles and we
saw each other every day. I recall, not without emotion, the exquisite
mornings in the park of the château in the company of
EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 (his friends called him
BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931), while he introduced me, all the
while painting, to the hidden beauties of the gardens. It was he who showed
me that each pond was of a different color, something that I had never
noticed. He had a childlike soul, pure, open to Nature and all of her
marvels. We got along very well; for that matter, who would not have gotten
along with that charming boyEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, full of
sweetness and tenderness. He adored his wifeGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener and endeavored to spare her the least burdens of daily
life; it was he who ordered from art suppliers, such as color merchants,
wrote to editors, bought supplies, so
[Page 202]
that she could devote herself entirely
to her art. For her part, she showed towards him an almost maternal
affection. Everyone in the quarter loved BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, so polite, so full of tact and kindness. The shopkeepers
got him coal and the sweet necessities, even in periods of rationing when it
was difficult to obtain them. The two spouses never left each other, sharing
each joy, each emotion, sleeping side by side with their little fox terrier,
"VâpeHvappe (fictional and historical), nicknamed Vâpe, the Wegeners’ (Sparres’) dog."
(10) They left their studio on the rue de Lillethe Wegeners’ studio (historical), located on rue de Lille in Paris in ParisParis (historical), capital of France and moved to the Champs de MarsChamps de Mars (historical), a park in Paris area, into one larger and nicer than the former. We were then living near the Place de l’AlmaPlace de l’Alma (historical), a bridge in Paris open to traffic, which allowed us to see them often, even in that city where, because of distances, it is difficult to see friends as often as one would like.
(11) I remember a somewhat curious little event that happened to me at the Wegeners. They had invited us to dinner to introduce us to one of their best friends and oldest, the Danish diplomat T.B.T. B. (historical), an unidentified Danish diplomat, a highly cultured man.
(12) "You will see how irresistible and captivating he is," GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener told me, "his conversation is dazzling and he knows the eighteenth century better than anyone, but he has one big flaw: he cannot see a pretty woman without trying to seduce her, and I must warn you that he is very persistent, especially with blondes."
(13) That night at dinner she introduced me to this Nordic Don JuanT. B. (historical), an unidentified Danish diplomat,
[Page 203]
who had arrived that morning from CopenhagenCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark and who had to leave a few days
later for his new post in MadridMadrid (historical), capital of Spain. I was
seated next to him at dinner, and I don’t know if the trip had tired him to
the point of being a dolt, but he said nothing at all to me and dropped the
conversation each time I made an effort to engage him. After what GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener had told me, I must admit I was a bit
piqued. During the salad course my neighborT. B. (historical), an unidentified Danish diplomat
placed his foot on mine, like a heavy caress. "This is too much, I said to
myself, he acts exhausted, ignores me completely, and then he thinks he can
play footsy with me...and in socks yet!" Since for the occasion the culprit
had removed his shoe, I tried to withdraw my foot without drawing the
attention of the other guests, a difficult task, my aggressor’s being
tenacious and heavy. I had hardly broken loose when he began again. I felt
myself turning red: to my horror, the keen foot was slowly climbing and was
now above my ankle while its owner kept his impassive and hypocritically
serene look. Such slyness made me lose it: "You’ll see," I said to myself,
and gathering all my forces I gave him a mighty kick. A dog’s cry rang out:
the real culprit was the fox terrierHvappe (fictional and historical), nicknamed Vâpe, the Wegeners’ (Sparres’) dog, who
got punished. This proved, once again, that one should be wary of one’s
imagination.
(14) I recall another little event that took place at the Wegeners. I was supposed to have dinner at my friend Baby de Friedlander-Fuld’sMarie-Anne von Goldschmidt-Rothschild (historical), (née Friedlander-Fuld, 1892-1973), known as Baroness Rotschildt; a friend of Kurt Warnekros place — now the baroness Goldschmidt-RothschildMarie-Anne von Goldschmidt-Rothschild (historical), (née Friedlander-Fuld, 1892-1973), known as Baroness Rotschildt; a friend of Kurt Warnekros — who was stopping in Paris. Then we planned to go together to EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 and GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener’s who were having a small party. When I arrived at BabyMarie-Anne von Goldschmidt-Rothschild (historical), (née Friedlander-Fuld, 1892-1973), known as Baroness Rotschildt; a friend of Kurt Warnekros’s I noticed that she seemed disappointed. "I’m furious," she said, "I wanted so much to wear my new bronze tulle dress tonight and I can’t!"
(15) "What happened? Didn’t they deliver it?"
(16) "No, it’s over there, behind you, on the chair."
(17) "Doesn’t it fit? Is it too tight, too big? We can maybe fix that."
(18) "No, none of that, on the contrary, it fits marvelously well, but that animal Hellstern didn’t deliver my brown satin shoes."
(19) "Don’t you have an old pair of brown ones that you could wear?"
(20) "No, the only pair I have is in a dreadful state; the tips are so worn that they’re white and one can see the lining."
(21) I had a brilliant idea: "We just have to rub them with a bar of chocolate and no one will notice." We ran to the kitchen and, several minutes later, my friendMarie-Anne von Goldschmidt-Rothschild (historical), (née Friedlander-Fuld, 1892-1973), known as Baroness Rotschildt; a friend of Kurt Warnekros came to the table in a ravishing dress with impeccable brown shoes.
(22) When we arrived at the Wegeners, she received
[Page 205]
compliments from everyone. We
sat down and they began to play a little music. The little dog VâpeHvappe (fictional and historical), nicknamed Vâpe, the Wegeners’ (Sparres’) dog, who, as you know, has a particular
fondness for feet, came to lie down at my friend BabyMarie-Anne von Goldschmidt-Rothschild (historical), (née Friedlander-Fuld, 1892-1973),
known as Baroness Rotschildt; a friend of Kurt Warnekros’s feet. As soon as she picked up the scent of
chocolate, she leaped on the tips of the shoes and began to lick them
voraciously. We tried to stop her, but she began to growl in a menacing way.
There was a general burst of laughter and we had to explain the origin of
this feast, which was a huge success.
(23) But let’s get back to our business, that is, the painters. When one day I was
admiring the ravishing back of a nude painted by GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, she confided to me: "You will never guess who posed
for that back...it’s BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 in person. For
some time now he has been serving as my model, which helps me a lot since I
would have a hard time finding another back like it." The painting
represented a sort of blonde bacchante with short hair crowned with vines,
nonchalantly reclining on a day bed, her head slightly tilted and turned
toward the viewer. The legs were also BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931’s. One would have sworn they were a woman’s legs, as they
were so long and tapered. I couldn’t get over it! GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener had taken a photo of EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 during one of the sessions, and I begged her to bring
it to the restaurant where we planned to dine with our husbands and
[Page 206]
mutual
friends. We passed around the photo that amazed everyone. Our friend, the
Marquise de S.G.Marquise de S.G. (historical), unidentified, whose husband
was late, cried out: "Let’s play a joke on EmilioMarquis (historical), husband of Marquise de S. G., unidentified, he’ll be here any second." GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener would show him the photo of one of her friends and see
if he recognized EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931. Like a good
Neapolitan, a skirt chaser, the MarquisMarquis (historical), husband of Marquise de S. G., unidentified
completely lost his head over this ravishing nude: "Oh, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, who is this? You say that it’s a friend
who posed to please you...but I must meet her right away. Swear that you’ll
introduce me to her." Hardly able to control her desire to laugh, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener promised him, but added that the person
in question was rather shy and away from ParisParis (historical), capital of France at the moment. The more she presented difficulties,
the more upset the MarquisMarquis (historical), husband of Marquise de S. G., unidentified became. He
even enlisted BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 to be a witness to
his wifeGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener’s promise. We were all
laughing so much we were crying. EmilioMarquis (historical), husband of Marquise de S. G., unidentified
refused to give back the photo. He kept it in his wallet and afterwards not
a day passed that he didn’t ask about the blond bacchante’s return. It got
to the point where once, leaving a soirée, he handed the famous photo
instead of his number to the woman tending the
cloakroom. "You old bastard! Who do you take me for?," screamed the aging
virgin, throwing it in his face.
(24) Faced with the tragic turn the events were taking, we decided to reveal the
truth
[Page 207]
to the red-faced MarquisMarquis (historical), husband of Marquise de S. G., unidentified. He took
it badly, tore up the photo in a bout of black rage, and for weeks spoke not
a word to any of us.
(25) I can’t help to digress once more from my topic to recount an anecdote that dates from about fifty years ago, the hero of which is the Archbishop of NaplesArchbishop of Naples (historical), unidentified but possibly Guglielmo Sanfelice d’Acquavilla, Archbishop of Naples from 1878-1897, the MarquisMarquis (historical), husband of Marquise de S. G., unidentified’ uncle.
(26) This prelate, known for his greed, had for years one valet who served as a factotum, and to whom he gave, however, only eight liras a month in salary. This servant came one day to ask for a raise.
(27) "MonsignorArchbishop of Naples (historical), unidentified but possibly Guglielmo Sanfelice d’Acquavilla, Archbishop of Naples from 1878-1897 knows how attached I am to him and that I would be heartbroken to have to leave his service, but I cannot go on like this. The cost of living is rising every day and I cannot even buy the necessities with my eight liras. I come then to pray MonsignorArchbishop of Naples (historical), unidentified but possibly Guglielmo Sanfelice d’Acquavilla, Archbishop of Naples from 1878-1897 to give me at least two more liras per month."
(28) "What you say is true," replied his ExcellencyArchbishop of Naples (historical), unidentified but possibly Guglielmo Sanfelice d’Acquavilla,
Archbishop of Naples from 1878-1897, "but with much regret, it is impossible for me to
give you more. However, since I understand very well that your current
salary is insufficient and since I am very satisfied with your services, I
want to do something for you. I will accord you, from today on, two hours of
freedom every afternoon, from one to three o’clock, at the time when traffic
is the
[Page 208]
most dense on the Château de l’Oeuf bridge, so that you can go there to beg. Thus,
everything will work out for the best."
(29) And so, every day one would see, at the entrance to the bridge, the Archbishop’s valet with his hand out. And that shocked no one...Oh, sweet NaplesNaples (historical), city in Italy.
(30) I return to the Wegeners, not to leave them again. I asked GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener when she recognized BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931’s feminine contours for the first time.
(31) "It goes back a long time," she answered, "even before the war. We were still
in CopenhagenCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark and I was doing the
portrait of a well-known actressAnna Larssen (1875-1955), a Danish actress, friend of the Wegeners. One day
she telephoned at the last moment to cancel. I was furious, and
disappointed, having set aside my afternoon for her. Seeing me frustrated by
not being able to continue my work, EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 offered to replace the model, at least for the dress,
if he was able to fit into it. I was stunned to see that, not only did it
fit him beautifully, but also that he had a woman’s shoulders, magnificent.
I amused myself by completing the illusion by putting a blond wig that I had
gotten at the carnival on his head and making him up as best as I could. I
began then to paint and was surprised, in the middle of work, by the real modelAnna Larssen (1875-1955), a Danish actress, friend of the Wegeners who came to excuse herself for
having broken her word. Seeing her dress on another person, she was a bit
surprised, but did not recognize EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931.
For a minute I let her think that a friend had replaced her to do me a favor
[Page 209]
and allow me to make progress on the portrait. The timbre of BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931’s voice ended up betraying him and
the young womanAnna Larssen (1875-1955), a Danish actress, friend of the Wegeners, laughing
wholeheartedly, couldn’t get over her shock. She invited herself to dinner,
had some champagne brought up "to drink to the good health of her new
friend, LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931." During the meal we baptized
BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 with champagne, and from then on,
he posed often for me, dressing as a woman any chance he got. BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 loved this sort of work and liked to
mystify people, who invariably took him for a daughter of Eve. He was a
sensation at various masked balls and he impersonated LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 more and more. One evening when I had a cold and
couldn’t go out, he put on my prettiest low cut dress and I carefully did
his hair and made him up. He went with one of our young friends to a dinner, followed by dancing, hosted every two
weeks at a club for artists and other cosmopolitan individuals, to which we
belonged. Except for these young friends and a woman we
knew, no one else was in on the secret. They introduced the newcomer as
Einar Wegener’sEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 sister and my
sister-in-law, adding that we were at home with the grippe. The beautiful
LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 was a big hit and stole the heart
of a cavalry officer, the Count of TColonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is
unidentified., who
was about fifty-five or sixty years old. He spent the entire evening
lavishing her with compliments. She had to promise to allow him to see her
again. He insisted on escorting her home and left her
[Page 210]
regretfully. Two days
later, as I worked alone in my studio, someone knocked on the door. Imagine
my surprise when the mature and mannerly gentlemanColonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is
unidentified whom LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 had
described to me as her beau stood on the threshold, a bit shy, his arms
filled with flowers. I almost dropped mine.
(32) "'Is this the home of Mademoiselle Lily WegenerLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931,' mumbled the poor manColonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is unidentified. 'Would you do me the courtesy of telling her that Colonel de T.Colonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is unidentified would like to see her.'
(33) "I invited him to come in and sit down explaining that my sister-in-lawLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 was
out and would be back late. He seemed shattered and stayed for a good half
hour talking to me about LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931’s physical and
mental charms. While I agreed with him, it was all I could do to keep a
straight face. I took the initiative to tell him that this young person
would soon be leaving to deal with family matters in DenmarkDenmark is a Scandinavian country in northern Europe whose capital is Copenhagen.. The Count de T.Colonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is
unidentified finally left, assuring me that he would be back soon. He
kept his word. In the meantime our friend, Madame de B.Madame de B. (historical), unidentified who was at the famous dinner and witnessed the soldierColonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is
unidentified’s coup de foudre, came to tell us
that the poor colonelColonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is
unidentified, more and more
irrational, thought of nothing but LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 and
even spoke of divorcing his wife to marry her. And so
when he came to see her, I told him that she had left suddenly the day
before for CopenhagenCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark. The wretch
was in despair. He confided in BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 and
told him he was surprised to find how little he resembled
[Page 211]
his delightful
sister. ‘Perhaps in the expression of the eyes, but that’s all.’ It took a
heroic effort not to betray ourselves and maintain demeanor that fit the
situation.
(34) "Afterwards, we had cards of CopenhagenCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark sent to Madame de B.Madame de B. (historical), unidentified signed ‘LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931’ on which the young person confirmed the lengthiness of her stay, leaving him with vague plans for marriage, all of which to calm the unhappy victim.
(35) "Happily, time did it’s work and we no longer saw the Count de T.Colonel de T. (fictional), the historical figure mentioned in Allatini’s memoir is unidentified"
(36) GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener knew BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 as an adolescent taking drawing and painting classes at
the Copenhagen Fine Arts AcademyThe Royal Danish Academy of Fine Arts (historical), founded in 1754 and located in
the Charlottenborg Palace in Copenhagen, it is the premier academy of arts in Denmark,
where the Wegeners both studied..
The young artist had a deep affection for the student and he became her best
friend. GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener was very flattered and
EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, madly in love, pined away,
realizing that he would never be anything more to her than a dear friend and
confidant. When she was seventeen, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener
had a romantic disappointment following which she became sad and indifferent
to other men who flirted with her. At this time she discovered that poor
EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 was dying of love for her. He
had a heart attack and doctors said that this nervous state would be fatal.
Already wounded, the young girl could not stand the idea of losing the
person dearest to her, after her mother. She ran to BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931’s bedside and told him that she had reconsidered
[Page 212]
and
consented to become his wife. The effect was magical and the young manEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931,
suddenly better, was soon able to walk the blond daughter of pastor GottliebGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener to the altar. These two children, barely
seventeen and twenty years old, shared a childlike innocence and young
EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, a virgin like his wifeGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, had never asked himself if he was up
to the duties that his new situation demanded. Naïve and knowing only
imperfectly what marriage had in store for girls, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener was only half surprised at how sweet and superficial
the caresses of her husbandEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 were. They
were perfectly satisfied with each other and when on some spring evenings
the young womanGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener experienced longings
that she could not define, their life together was so harmonious, so smooth
and tender, that she attached only a vague importance to them. After long
months, they noted that sexual joys were denied to their union, which did
not prevent them in any way from continuing to live in perfect harmony. They
had the same tastes in art, the same concept of life and, finally, they
could not even for an instant do without one another. They loved each other
and fought like two children. I can still hear Madame GottliebJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb), during a visit to ParisParis (historical), capital of France, cry, "When will you cease being children?" And
GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener answered: "But, mamanJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb), never I hope!"
(37) For some time, I had been noticing with anguish
[Page 213]
(or perhaps someone had
brought it to my attention) that BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931’s
figure, already effeminate, was becoming more and more ambiguous: his
jackets seemed more pinched at the waist, his chest bulged, and his swaying
gait recalled that of an odalisque; even his voice was taking on feminine
inflections. My husbandEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini had noticed as
well and "one," that is to say my family, my friends and acquaintances,
finally all the well-meaning tribe of those who please themselves by making
you discover, with touching solicitude, disagreeable things that you might
have missed. "One" was stunned, "one" disapproved of our relations and
friendship with a being so clearly ambiguous. I spoke to GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener about what I had observed; she answered
that she herself noticed it a long time ago, even though she lived with him,
and it was torturing her terribly. "But the most lamentable thing," she
added, "is that BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 also realized it and
suffered more than you can imagine. He notices that one turns around in the
street, that one laughs when he gets on a bus, and he hears outrageous
things being shouted at him. Everyone takes him for a homosexual, and you
know as well as I do that he is as indifferent to men as to an old shoe. Do
you know what happened the other evening at a dinner at Karen BramsonKaren Bramson (1875-1936), a Danish author’s? There were a dozen of us and
since some were French, the conversation was in that language. Abruptly, in
the middle of the meal, Karen BramsonKaren Bramson (1875-1936), a Danish author,
[Page 214]
who as you know doesn’t manage very well what passes through her head, cries
across the table to BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931: ‘You, WegenerEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, naturally you like men?’ And
EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, witty as usual, answered her
smiling, ‘No, madame, you’re wrong, I am lesbian.’
(38) "I even sent him to consult two physicians but one took him for a crazy person, the other for a pervert, such that he came back more depressed than ever. He even began to experience a kind of malaise every month and, what is even more curious, is that his personality and mentality became feminized more than his physique. He is only happy as LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 and spends entire afternoons dressed as her, reading poetry, embroidering, baking or playing with the little dogHvappe (fictional and historical), nicknamed Vâpe, the Wegeners’ (Sparres’) dog. He says that like this he forgets everything and feels in his element. You and I alone can understand this situation, and I haven’t spoken to anyone else about it; that would be to expose us, BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 and me, to those who would ridicule us, or, like the physicians, take us for vile or crazy. You must understand my desperation, seeing him suffer so and to be unable to do anything..."
(39) Towards spring BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931’s condition had grown
noticeably worse. GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener decided to spend
a few months in RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy, hoping that the
change of climate and of surroundings would do him good. They left, took
a small apartment with studio
[Page 215]
in the Eternal CityRome (historical), capital of Italy. We didn’t see them again for a
long time and the news I received not at all reassuring: EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 experienced more and more vertigo,
headaches and depression; GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener
envisioned a prompt return to ParisParis (historical), capital of France if
this state of affairs continued. It wasn’t until the end of autumn that we
saw our friends again. They invited us to dinner in a little Italian restaurant near them.
(40) That morning I got a phone call from my friend, Professor WKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948. — the celebrated German gynecologist — who was passing through Paris. He was only free that very evening and wanted very much to see us. I cancelled the date with the Wegeners, explaining the situation. At about four o’clock there was another call from the physicianKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948, held up due to a car problem, on the outskirts of ParisParis (historical), capital of France. He was very sorry but wouldn’t be back until very late after an appointment, and our evening was ruined.
(41) "Let’s reset our dinner date with the EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931s," I said to my husbandEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician, who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini.
(42) "No, we’ll see them another day. They’ll think we’re crazy to change our minds at every moment."
(43) At that moment I had a strange intuition that we should, at all costs, see
our friends that evening. It was like a command that I had received from a
superior will. I explained to my husbandEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini that the closeness of our relationship with
[Page 216]
the
Wegeners was such that they would not stand on ceremony. I let them know
that we would come by to pick them up at about eight o’clock.
(44) Although we expected to find BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 changed, we had a horrible shock when we saw him. Our poor friendEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 was a shadow of his former self, gaunt, pasty complexion, sunken eyes surrounded by large dark circles, with a hopeless expression that I’ll never forget. He made a heroic effort to appear lighthearted during the meal, but in his eyes there persisted the look of a tortured beast that I could not stand. Not being able to contain myself, I took GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener aside and told her about my painful impression.
(45) "I was going to speak to you myself about it," she answered. "I’m sick about it! Battered by atrocious constant suffering, the poor soul isn’t able to sleep. He feels his forces diminishing every day and if no one can do anything to help him, I fear the worst. He can’t go on like this! His male organs are atrophying little by little, his breasts are developing, he endures tortures every month and I don’t dare consult physicians here because of our first experience."
(46) At that moment, I had a distinct vision of the tall figure of my friend,
Professor W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 His passage through
ParisParis (historical), capital of France seemed to be not a coincidence,
but the hand of destiny. Seized by an uncustomary eloquence, I laid out my
plan to GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener: call
[Page 217]
a big specialist the
next morning, explain the case in a few words and get an appointment.
Comforted and full of hope, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener
promised to do her best to send her husbandEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 to me the next morning. She had, however, a hard time
convincing him; at the last minute he wanted to back out, having abandoned
all hope.
(47) The few details that I gave Professor W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 on the phone were enough to raise his interest; he immediately set a time. EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 arrived at my place early; he was very agitated and I had a hard time calming him, to convince him that everything would work out once he was in the hands of the admirable specialistKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948.
(48) "I didn’t want to tell you in front of GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener," he told me, "but I have decided to kill myself if I
can’t become who I really am, a woman. Think of it, HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, I am no longer anything but a human
wreck, a useless waste. Physically and mentally ill — I can no longer even
hold a brush, nor do anything to help GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener— I refuse to be a burden to her. She has been admirable
with me; no one would be able to understand to what extent…except you
perhaps? ...I promised both of you to consult this great physicianKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948. This will be my final attempt; if
he can do nothing, I am determined to die... it will be a relief to me...
and also to my dear GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener...when the
first sadness goes away. I will no longer hamper her
[Page 218]
life as I have been
doing for a long time. In my case, it would be cowardly to go on living.
Look at what I’ve become!"
(49) Saying this, he opened his shirt and bared the most beautiful woman’s breasts that I had ever seen. I was overwhelmed and truly "realized" at that moment everything that he had been telling me.
(50) When we got to my friend, Professor W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948’s, I acted as interpreter. I had to explain to him, in German, the progress of EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931’s metamorphosis from the beginning. I waited in an adjoining room while he examined him. He came back a quarter of an hour later, seized by an agitation that stunned me in a manKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 whom I had never seen as anything but impassive.
(51) "Do you know, dear friendHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, that you have brought me a case that is unique in
the history of medical science, a case waited for during an entire
existence, without ever having been encountered: your friend is the only
true hermaphrodite who exists or has existed, for he had truly been a man,
an undersized, inadequate, atrophied man, but a man nonetheless in every
accepted meaning of the term. In general, the other beings to whom one
applies this name are not real hermaphrodites but only men afflicted with an
inguinal hernia that keeps their organs inside the body, thus one is able to
take them for women. Following a physical shock, an accident or some
phenomenon like that, the suspended organ descends abruptly and takes its
[Page 219]
normal place: the so-called woman then becomes a man, but, in reality, she
has always been one without suspecting it. While WegenerEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 was first a man and has actually evolved towards the
feminine sex, which is totally different from ordinary cases of
hermaphroditism. He thus represents the first perfect example of the
androgyne. Actually, there exist in him both sexes and it is the struggle
between them that is torturing this poor being. If there is no intervention,
he will succumb in a short time, whether because of the struggle between
them, or by his own hand, since he is unable to endure this horrible
suffering much longer. I see only one way out: rid him of what remains of
his first sex and graft onto the ovaries — for he certainly has ovaries — new
ovaries, in good condition. Then later, when he can tolerate it, a third and
final surgery to open a normal path to genital function. I easily imagine
the masculine attentions with which your friend must have been harassed, for
hermaphrodites exercise a powerful sexual seduction on men, unknown to them.
All this will allow you to understand something that one is generally
ignorant of and which causes so many injustices and calumnies in our pitiful
society: many homosexuals are beings who possess a male organ in which there
are ovaries instead of testicles. It’s the same for a lot of lesbians who
have testicles where
[Page 220]
the ovaries should be. These unhappy ones thus unjustly
suffer public scorn and disgust when their proclivities are — on the
whole — normal and not vile and perverse as one likes to make them feel.
(52) "I will prescribe first for your friendEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 a treatment to prepare him to endure the trial that awaits him. Towards the beginning of March I will notify him and he will have to come to BerlinBerlin (historical), capital of Germany immediately where my colleague Professor G.Erwin Gohrbandt (1890–1965), a Berlin surgeon who performed the first operation on Lili Elvenes in 1930 will perform the first operation. As soon as he’s recovered he will come — or rather she will come — to DresdenDresden (historical), city in Germany’s FrauenklinikMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948." [Women’s Clinic] where I will perform the second intervention, in which his true sex will be revealed. May he have bon courage while waiting, which I’m certain that he will have, for one can only bow before his valor." Then, addressing EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 himself: "Good bye then, dear sir, while waiting to be able to say: Hello, dear miss."
(53) It was a transformed EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 that I brought back to his wifeGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener! I have never seen such a change in so little time. My friendEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931’s face had gone from the most harrowing anguish to the most perfect serenity, like those skies that, darkened by a storm, suddenly brighten, lit by a radiant clarity.
(54) During the following two months, poor BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, as if touched by a magician's wand, regained physical and mental strength. GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener told me often about his joy and relief.
Page 221(55) It was on a beautiful morning in March that the two of us accompanied him to the Gare du NordGare du Nord (historical), a train station in Paris. He got settled in his compartment and, gallant as usual, he offered his reserved corner seat to a young woman who thanked him with a charming smile. Her "Thank you, sir," made us laugh. We knew that BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 was wearing a man’s suit for the last time, about which he didn’t stop rejoicing about during the taxi ride. GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener thought that she had the time to finish a very important commission and to rejoin her husbandEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 before the intervention but she had to leave precipitously that same week, notified by telegram that "everything went admirably well." Hardly arrived in BerlinBerlin (historical), capital of Germany, EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, examined by Marcus [Magnus] HirschfeldMagnus Hirschfeld (1868–1935), a German physician and one of the most influential sexologists of the time; Einar Wegener was examined at his Institute in March 1930 and several other BerlinBerlin (historical), capital of Germany authorities, underwent, at the hand of Professor G.Erwin Gohrbandt (1890–1965), a Berlin surgeon who performed the first operation on Lili Elvenes in 1930, the excision that would make him, definitively, LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931.
(56) GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener brought women’s underwear, a pink bathrobe and an entire arsenal of makeup and perfume to celebrate LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 and give her a truly feminine appearance.
(57) Upon arriving at the clinicErwin Gohrbandt's private clinic (historical) at Augsburger Str. 66, Berlin,
the travelerGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener was first of all struck
by the change of the voice of her former husbandEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931. The operation was enough to transform timbre of his
voice and it was a pretty soprano who welcomed her.
The patientLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 rested, pale but radiant, on her
pillows after having valiantly endured the suffering that had released
her — finally! — from the chrysalis that had been so detested. She was pampered,
spoiled,
[Page 222]
surrounded by flowers, solicitude. The few Scandinavian friends who
were in BerlinBerlin (historical), capital of Germany visited her every day.
She was the idol of the clinicErwin Gohrbandt's private clinic (historical) at Augsburger Str. 66, Berlin,
one spoke of nothing but her, of her courage, of her sweetness and of her
extraordinary adventure.
(58) GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener quickly made up her dear girlLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 (for this was how she thought of her now), did her hair, put on her nightgown and the pink robe that I had long promised BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 for LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 and that she brought her on my behalf. One can imagine the great amazement of Professor G.Erwin Gohrbandt (1890–1965), a Berlin surgeon who performed the first operation on Lili Elvenes in 1930 upon entering the room, that very evening, when he saw, in place of his patient, a ravishing young ladyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 all dolled up, perfumed and hair curled to receive him.
(59) The weeks that followed were a dream come true for poor LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931: for her first outing, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener surprised her with a beautiful fur coat and then took her to the stores to choose everything that was still missing from her trousseau.
(60) As planned, I had the honor to receive LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931’s
first letter. The handwriting was so different that I could hardly believe,
while tearing it open, that it was written in her hand: in place of
EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931’s thick down strokes, elegant
and light strokes flowed on the page, but what surprised me most was
LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931’s style, virginal, sensitive,
delicate, the handwriting of a young girl and a romantic one: "BerlinBerlin (historical), capital of Germany. March
10, 1930.
[Page 223]
Dear and great friendHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe. I am so delighted by your letter and I kiss your
dear name. I am so happy but so very tired that it is impossible for me
to write. The operation lasted one hour and I screamed for hours
afterwards (with a clear voice like Elisabeth SchumannElisabeth Schumann (1888-1952), a German opera singer’s, according to my superb surgeonErwin Gohrbandt (1890–1965), a Berlin surgeon who performed the first operation on
Lili Elvenes in 1930.). BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931
lived and LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 will soon be a girl with
a proper passport. Spring sings in my heart and I cry from happiness and
I am fearless faced with all the suffering that awaits me. I adore you.
LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931
(61) P.S. — BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 has celebrated the funeral of his life as a boy."
(62) And again, March 15: "Everyone here spoils me and calls me LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931. They compliment me a lot on my legs. That suits me very well. I will never be a strong-minded woman. Don’t you think, dear HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with a chapter on Lili Elbe, that I should have pink, not red, nails for the big operation in DresdenDresden (historical), city in Germany? At the moment I no longer try to contain my joy when I feel so happy. BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 is fading away more and more and Professor W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 is going to give him the coup de grâce."
(63) Several weeks later, two elegant young women left for DresdenDresden (historical), city in Germany’s FrauenklinikMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik
in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948." and introduced themselves to Professor W.Kurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948,
[Page 224]
who, having not yet met
GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener and having last seen a gaunt
BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 in a man’s jacket, couldn’t
identify the seductive creatures who stood before him, laughing.
(64) The FrauenklinikMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948." is really a city having five hundred beds and all the modern amenities. LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 was settled into the most beautiful room, and there too she became the focus of general interest. The second operation was long and grave. She came out of it very weak, but very happy, for the heart and new soul of a young girl had given themselves to her saviorKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948, who had liberated her from a martyr’s existence, in order to open for her the golden doors of life and hope.
(65) DresdenDresden (historical), city in Germany, April 1930: "My whole life would not suffice to thank you for having
sent me to this extraordinary manKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948,
this benevolent geniusKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 who gave
me a new life. I adore my dear Professor WKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948...I love him, but with a measure of respect, as if he
were an all-powerful god. Dear HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, you will understand your little LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 when I tell you that I have never seen
his eyes, because I have never dared look at him. Often I would like to
tell him something, I don’t get any further than smiling stupidly and
saying: ‘Yes, master.’ I wish he were a pasha or
a sultan so that I could be his slave. FrauenklinikMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik
in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948." is an earthly paradise! I like my
suffering better here. So that is where I
[Page 225]
am! I have a new pair of
ovaries that behave like little fauns in my painful stomach. My room is
the only one with a big mirror, when He gives me permission to get up, I
will be able to stand in front of it. GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener wants to do His portrait. What is this magic power
that affects everyone who comes near him? There is a charming young girl who comes to clean my room, who said to me: ‘I
clean to save my life, if HeKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 ever
saw a speck of dust and scolded me, I would die!’ HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, how fantastic is it that from a life headed down
and at an end, He created a new life overflowing with hope, love and
spring. It’s the work of a god! What heartbreak, the day when I will
have to leave this clinicMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik
in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948." in
the forest of white birches. I have dreamed that
He will
continue to operate on me until there will be nothing left to Him but my
heart trembling in his sweet, fine hands. HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, you have a heart of gold that you spend
endlessly for the happiness of others. I hope you will never regret all
that you have done for your little LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931.
I, who am a little afraid of my first steps in life, I feel protected by
your friendship."
(66) For his part, the celebrated surgeonKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948
seemed touched by the sweetness and courage of his little patient and showed almost paternal feelings
[Page 226]
for her, to which
was now added a professional interest in this most fascinating of all cases.
Professor WKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948. had a lovely respect
for GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, whose admirable conduct in a
unique situation he appreciated. He had given her the privilege of going up
to his place to rest, or paint, in his comfortable living room. In gratitude
for everything he had done, she undertook to do his portrait, in his white
surgeon’s coat. The nurses and the domestics took special care of
the surgical patient, in order to please the masterKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948, all of
them showering him with fearful adoration, mixed with respect. He moved
about on the waves of feminine admiration like a sultan in his harem; the
devotion of the entire staff has become a sort of religious rapture.
(67) One afternoon, while LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 took her siesta, stretched out on a chaise lounge in the clinic’s park, an old woman approached her and engaged her in conversation: "How are you now, little lady? You seem to have better color and you will soon be fully recovered from giving birth." My girlLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 began to get up. "And your baby, is it a boy or girl?"
(68) "Neither," replied LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 without blinking, "the Good Lord sent me twins."
(69) LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 left the clinicMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948." and her dear saviorKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 with regret and went to complete her recovery in the mountains of SaxonySaxony (historical), a state in eastern Germany, in the company of GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener.
Page 227(70) "He has sent us for several days in ErzgebirgeErzgebirge (historical), mountain range in eastern Germany, between SaxonySaxony (historical), a state in eastern Germany and BohemiaBohemia (historical), a region of the Czech Republic, but it is so cold here that we are going to leave this place where we are shivering in our little summer frocks."
(71) They returned to take leave of the ProfessorKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 and left for CopenhagenCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark, to get their marriage annulled and put
LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931’s papers in order. She obtained
from the King of DenmarkChristian Carl Frederik Albert Alexander Vilhelm (historical) (1870 – 1947), King
of Denmark from 1912-1947 a change of her family name to Elbe,
after DresdenDresden (historical), city in Germany’s river, witness to her
renaissance. LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 spent a long visit with
her family, trembling when she went out, afraid of being recognized,
dreading the moment when her metamorphosis was made known, making her the
prey of journalists who would make her a national phenomenon. She didn’t
want to touch a palette, nor anything that could remind her of BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931. She spent her days sewing, looking in the
mirror, embroidering, doing her nails. She was modest to a fault, whereas
BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 loved to recount salacious jokes,
she blushed at the drop of a hat and in contrast to her first incarnation
(EinarEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 was a confirmed atheist), she
became edifyingly pious, with an intense mysticism. Her second brother,
HolgerHolger Wegener (b. 1880), Einar Wegener’s brother, and her sister-in-lawSister-in-law (fictional), modeled on Einar Wegener’s sister-in-law, Musse (a nickname),
married to Holger Wegener, with whom BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener;
died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 got along very well, were touchingly good
to LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 and welcomed her wholeheartedly.
Worn out from the mental tension of these last months and knowing that
LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 was in
[Page 228]
good hands, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener gave in to her motherJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb)’s insistence that she wanted to take her to rest in
ItalyItaly is a European country whose capital is Rome., and left with her for
RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy. They stayed at a family-run
pension owned by a Danish woman that they knew. It took
GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener all she had to distract
herself and go out with Italian friends, for, since the annulment of her
marriage, Madame GottliebJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb), believing
that she had reverted to a time when her daughterGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener was an adolescent, gave her no freedom and watched
over her like a dragon. The old womanJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb), wanting to know PompeiiPompeii (historical), an ancient Roman city, decided to visit with her daughterGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener for a week. Under the constant supervision of
her motherJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb), the young womanGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener looked for a way to free
herself, to be able, finally, to relax. The morning of the return, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, disconcerted, walked around in the old
part of NaplesNaples (historical), city in Italy, when she noticed
a small church that drew her to it mysteriously.
She entered and approached the altar of the Virgin, she prayed her to come
to her aid, to protect her and guide her life towards a loyal and good
person who would love her sincerely and with whom she could share the rest
of her existence. She left comforted, and that evening, in the train
bringing them back to RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy, she resolved
to let her motherJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb) return to
DenmarkDenmark is a Scandinavian country in northern Europe whose capital is Copenhagen. alone and to prolong her
stay in ItalyItaly is a European country whose capital is Rome.. At the pension, a pile of
mail waited for her. As she moved towards the hotel salon to go through it, a masculine figure got up to greet
her. She recognized an aviation officer who had been introduced to her
before her
[Page 229]
trip to NaplesNaples (historical), city in Italy. "Allow me to
offer you my respects, madame, and tell you how happy I am about your
return. I was afraid that you had left RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy definitively and this house had lost its charm during
your absence." GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener responded with a
few words and accepted a cigarette. After this first conversation Captain PortaFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband waited each evening for the young
woman’s return, and their liking for each other grew more and more. The day
of Madame GottliebJustine (née Østerberg) Gottlieb (historical), mother of Gerda Wegener (née Gottlieb)’s departure,
GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener was surprised to find
the officerFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband waiting for her at the
station exit. "I wanted to be sure that you would still be here for me," he
said with emotion. Won over by the passion of this handsome and likeable boyFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband, she agreed to listen to him. They
discovered that they got along famously, had the same tastes, and when
Fernando PortaFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband asked her to become his
wife, she accepted with a full heart after having told him of her past and
of the adventure, so unbelievable, that had cast a shadow over her. "You are
now doubly dear to me," he answered, "and admiration filled with respect is
mingled with my tenderness; LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 will be our
child. I understand that you do not wish to abandon her. She will always
have a room in our home, a place in our household."
(72) When GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener told us of her engagement, I
felt great joy. She was finally receiving the recompense she so deserved,
the happiness that I had always wished for her. During a short trip to
RomeRome (historical), capital of Italy, my husbandEric Allatini (1886–1943), friend of the Wegeners, a writer of fairy tales and a musician,
who was of Italian origin; married to Hélène Allatini had the opportunity to meet
"NandoFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband" and found him
[Page 230]
most charming. He belonged to
one of the best Livornese families and had just been appointed vice-consul
to MarrakechMarrakech (historical), a city in Morocco. He went there, at the
beginning of February, to arrange their settling, while GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener returned to CopenhagenCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark, to manage her affairs, organize her painting
exhibition and spend a few weeks with LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931.
She also wanted, during this visit, to convert to Catholicism, to share the
faith of her future husbandFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband. Above all,
she wanted to show her gratitude to the Virgin who had granted her wish.
(73) Upon her arrival, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener was greatly
touched by the exuberant joy with which LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931
welcomed her and received her recent bliss. The time passed fast and
delightfully, while GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener built
thousands of plans for the future, to which LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 listened with a melancholic rapture: at the beginning
of April, GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener would rejoin her fiancéFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband in MarrakechMarrakech (historical), a city in Morocco, where they would soon be married. The first few
days of June LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 would leave for ParisParis (historical), capital of France; she would spend two weeks with us, before
leaving for MoroccoMorocco (historical), a country in northern Africa where the happy
couple would be waiting for her. The time passed quickly and soon came the
moment when a group of friends accompanied GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener to the station. She was radiant in spite of a shadow
of regret at the thought of leaving poor LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 behind her. But it was only a shadow, in effect, for
wasn’t she supposed to rejoin her, and don’t two months pass quickly,
especially when one is happy. The two women embraced one more time: "Until
we meet again, little LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931, until we meet
again,
[Page 231]
in MarrakechMarrakech (historical), a city in Morocco!" "See you soon,
dear GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener, as always!"
(74) The whistle blows, the train moves off, handkerchiefs are waving; for a long time GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener follows with her eyes the slender figure of her beloved girlLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 and, at the very moment when the train makes a curve and disappears from sight, she experiences a sudden and harrowing dread, a tightening of her heart, as if she were seeing LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 for the last time!...
(75) April, May, June... I began to prepare for the arrival of LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931. I broke the news of the death of her friend BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931 to my daughterJoselyn Allatini (1918-1947), daughter of Hélène Kann Allatini, who loved him so tenderly. I dried her tears and tried to calm her announcing that Einar’s sister, LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931, was coming to visit us for several days and that she so resembled her poor brother that she would surely replace him in her affection. Then I wrote to LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 to be dressed in mourning upon her arrival.
(76) Having thus definitively buried poor BéEinar Magnus Andreas Wegener (b. 1882), a Danish painter; married to Gerda Wegener; died as Lili Elbe in Dresden, 1931, I prepared LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931’s room. To flatter her vanity, I had embroidered sheets put on the bed, put a large mirror on the wall, and I spread small luxuries around: candies, collars, perfumes, ribbons, sure to please her.
(77) The day before she was to arrive, we were totally stunned and disappointed to
receive the following letter from our friend: "My very
dear HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with
a chapter on Lili Elbe, I left from CopenhagenCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark for ParisParis (historical), capital of France Wednesday morning. That evening I telephoned
my IdolKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 in DresdenDresden (historical), city in Germany, from BerlinBerlin (historical), capital of Germany.
[Page 232]
Then I came Thursday evening to the FrauenklinikMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik
in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948.". An hour later he
decided to operate on me again. I am so exhausted by the preparatory
treatment that I am undergoing, that I can hardly write. Maybe surprise
and a little fear have something to do with it — since I know that it is
very serious this time. When I say that I’m afraid, it is rather for
him, who is superbly courageous and will stop at nothing to make me
happy! Please forgive me if I don’t come to ParisParis (historical), capital of France right away, but when I’m in his presence I forget
everything else. In DenmarkDenmark is a Scandinavian country in northern Europe whose capital is Copenhagen. I had
become a less timid person and for a few instants I had been able to
speak freely; but that was short-lived and all that’s left of me is a
humble little thing before this great adored masterKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948. I have already gone to bed and although he hasn’t
told me, I know that the operation will be tomorrow morning and that it
will be very complicated. Even death seems sweet to me here where my
heart lives forever, but I understand that death would be a betrayal of
him. Therefore, there is a legitimate little delay in my arrival in
ParisParis (historical), capital of France, dear friend, but when I do
come I will be marriageable and who knows if one fine day I won’t also
have children?"
(78) GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener received a similar letter and not
only did she feel a violent disappointment, but in reading it she also felt
a justified furor. Hadn’t she recommended
[Page 233]
to LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931, during her time in CopenhagenCopenhagen (historical), capital of Denmark, to take at least a year’s rest before having
another surgery? She made her swear it, fearing the magnetic attraction that
the ProfessorKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 cast over
his patient would persuade her to desire the
surgery sooner, in order to be following once again in his adored wake. With
that, it was impossible to do anything, even send a telegram, since
according to the date, LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 should be on the
operating table at the moment that GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener
was reading the letter. Taken by a veritable despair, by rage, confronted
with a fait accompli, she opened the door to the room she had prepared for
LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 with such tenderness. Upon going
into it, in spite of the torrid heat that prevailed in MarrakechMarrakech (historical), a city in Morocco in that season, a glacial chill
penetrated her and it seemed that the room had been plunged into a greenish
light; under the mosquito net, she felt the presence of a dead person. She
recoiled, felt a shiver and a few moments later it was with difficulty that
her husbandFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband was able to calm her
fears.
(79) In DresdenDresden (historical), city in Germany, the surgery, like all or
almost all operations, was successful, but poor LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 suffered like a condemned person and was unable to get
her strength back. Professor WKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948. had to
admit to himself that his patient’s organism would not be able to fight
against this last ordeal, and feeling himself impotent to save her, his
visits became less and less frequent. LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931’s
passionate adoration for her surgeonKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948
had become her unique reason to live; and so, deprived of his presence, she
no longer forced herself
[Page 234]
to react and stopped fighting to recover her
health. She was tormented by the thought that she had been to him only
something to experiment on. The time had come for vacations and the ProfessorKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948 left the clinicMunicipal Women's Clinic (fictional and historical) is the Staatliche Frauenklinik
in Dresden, directed by Professor Kurt Warnekros from 1925 to 1948." to take the rest indispensable
to his profession. It was also a relief to no longer feel his heart tighten
when entering LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931’s room; he realized that
in spite of all that she had endured and that he himself had tried, the poor
creature was doomed. His departure finally caused the unhappy girlLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 to give into despair and to aggravate the
bitterness that she had served as a guinea pig for this person whom she
loved more than her life so much that she let herself die.
(80) We learned all of this afterwards, for the little nurse
who had taken care of LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 until the end,
recounted her agony to GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener when she
went to DresdenDresden (historical), city in Germany a year later. In the
midst of atrocious physical and mental suffering, the heroic girlLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 thought of only one thing: that GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener knew nothing of this and wasn’t troubled
in her happiness. As for herself, at the price of much effort, she hid her
true condition from her, writing letters full of joy and hope for a rapid
recovery. Doctor F.Doctor F. (historical), unidentified, assistant to
the masterKurt Warnekros (1882–1949), a German gynecologist who performed all but the first
of four surgeries on Lili Elvenes; director of the Women’s Clinic in Dresden (Staatliche
Frauenklinik) from 1925 to 1948,
a man full of heart and pity, had done all that he could to soften the last
weeks of the poor little patient, coming to see her
often, sending his wife, who brightened her room with
flowers and brought their little monkey to distract her. In the last
[Page 235]
days of
August, feeling that her agony was soon to end, LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener
(1882), died in Dresden, 1931 asked for a notary to do her will. She left the little
that she had to GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener. She asked
the little nurse to fix her up after her death,
coiffed and made up as GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator;
married to Einar Wegener liked to
do, and to remember her thus.
(81) "When I die let one put, / Before nailing my coffin, / A bit of rouge on my cheek, / A bit of black around my eyes."
(82) From the "Coquetterie Posthume" [Posthumous Vanity] of Théophile GautierThéophile Gautier (1811-1872), a French novelist, author of Mademoiselle de Maupin (1835), in which the female protagonist, disguised as a man, seduces both a young woman and her lover.
(83) She even recommended that they put pink polish on her nails.
(84) At the beginning of September she wrote with difficulty to GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener that she was much better and would have the joy to be able, after a little while, to join NandoFernando Porta (b. 1897), Gerda Wegener’s second husband and her, in MarrakechMarrakech (historical), a city in Morocco. To me, she wrote:
(85) "I am beginning to get up and will soon be able to take a few steps in the garden. I think happily about the not so far off day when I will be able to leave for ParisParis (historical), capital of France and about the happy moments that I will spend with all of you so dear to me; to the moment when I can embrace you and express my gratitude for having known, thanks to your intervention, my true life, my life as a woman. May you be blessed for that, my dear HélèneHélène Kann Allatini (1887-1943), friend of the Wegeners; author of Mosaiques, with a chapter on Lili Elbe."
Page 236(86) In spite of having been formally forbidden to inform anyone whatsoever, the little nurse had secretly written the whole truth to Holger WegenerHolger Wegener (b. 1880), Einar Wegener’s brother, the brother whom LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931 loved so very much. The end was now too close to inform GerdaGerda Maria Frederikke Gottlieb Wegener (1885-1940), an art deco painter and illustrator; married to Einar Wegener; the decline being so rapid. It had been a great and final joy for the dying one. She felt at peace surrounded by true affection and died gently, her hand in his, her thoughts far away across the sea towards that land of AfricaAfrica is a continent south of Europe. Gerda Wegener lived in Morocco in northern Africa with her second husband. that she would never know...
(87) Under a slab of white stone, inscribed
(88) LILY ELBELili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931
(89) 12 septembre 1931
(90) repose the remains of little LilyLili Elbe (fictional and historical), legal name Lili Ilse Elvenes; born Einar Wegener (1882), died in Dresden, 1931, but her soul, pure and beautiful, contemplates with bliss the happiness of she who was the most dear to her. That is her reward for having so suffered and so loved.
(91) If, as such a close witness to this story, I was determined to write an exact
account, it is in order to annihilate all that has been published about this
painful affair. With malicious intent, or as a farcical spectacle, one has
tried to debase two of the best people, whose
[Page 237]
honorable souls and
high-mindedness could serve as an example to a great many human beings,
especially those who have so unjustly slandered them.
(92) I believe in so doing to make myself worthy of a memory that is so profoundly dear to me and of a friendship that I place among the most beautiful that I possess.